A Want So Wicked (A Need So Beautiful #2)(51)
Author: Suzanne Young

“I can’t help you now,” I say. “I can’t guide you or bring you into the light.”

“I know that,” he shoots back. “But you’re filled with more light than any Forgotten I’ve ever met. You can handle the Shadow, you can stay bright, even next to me. You make me feel warm. When the time comes, I won’t let you cross. You’ll learn to love me back, and then we can spend the rest of time here. It will all be ours.”

I stare at him, amazed that he believes this. Light and Shadows can’t mix, but he obviously missed that memo. His eyes are earnest, as if having me by his side will make up for all the horrible things he’s done, things he will do. He’s a Shadow—by definition he spreads misery.

“No,” I say. “I don’t want you anywhere near me.”

That seems to wound him. “I was kind to you,” he snaps. “I made it as easy as possible. I was careful.” The cracks in his skin widen as his anger grows. And before I realize what’s happening, a vision from Abe’s mind slides in.

It’s late at night in the desert, the remains of a campfire glowing red, the tents silent around it. I see Abe approach one of them, his shoes quiet on the sandy ground. He pauses, as if waiting for someone. Just then, Marissa stumbles out. She looks as if she’s been crying.

“You came back,” she says.

“I always come back. You know that.”

She nods and crosses over to him, putting her arms around his waist and hugging him. Abe brushes his fingers through her hair.

“You love me so much,” he whispers. “You love me so much that it makes you sick.”

At that moment, Marissa turns away, retching and convulsing. Abe smiles. “Remember that time,” he begins, “when you told me that I didn’t have a chance with someone like you? When was it? A year, two years ago?” She slowly lifts her head to meet his gaze. “Then you started dreaming about me,” he continues. “You tried to run. But I got you back. Next thing you knew, you were calling me, following me. You were completely crazy for me. You let me do whatever I wanted to you.”

Tears run down Marissa’s cheeks. “And what do you want now?” she asks.

Abe shrugs. “You’ve outgrown your uses, Riss. And now I just want you to jump off that cliff. It’s so much easier, don’t you think?”

“No,” Marissa murmurs, tears wet on her cheeks. “Please, no.”

“Shh . . .” Abe hooks his finger under her chin as he beckons her up. When she’s standing, he kisses her softly, almost sweetly. When he pulls back, her eyes are glazed over, almost dreamlike. “You were a fun toy,” Abe says affectionately. “But you’re broken. I need something new, and I won’t have you ruin that for me. Now”—he opens his arms wide and steps back—“go on and jump.”

My eyes flutter open and I gasp, horrified by what I’ve seen. “You killed her,” I say, fresh fear pulling at my chest. “You killed Marissa.”

“I had no choice,” Abe says. “As Marceline would say, she was my Want. I was compelled—had been for a while. If anything, she should have been grateful. She’d been meaning to kill herself for months.”

“You’re a monster.”

“Not completely. But I will take you by force, if I have to.”

Abe reaches out and grabs my wrist, wrenching me painfully closer. He stares down into my eyes, the lines in his chin smoothing until he’s handsome once again. “I can make you believe anything I want,” he whispers. “But I know you hate being manipulated. So this once . . . I won’t. Just so long as you don’t fight.”

And then he leans forward to kiss me.

I’m wearing a winter jacket but still shaking uncontrollably as I get into Lucy’s car. It’s nearly three in the morning and my father never came home. I’m hoping he fell asleep on the couch in his office. I don’t want him anywhere near our house right now. My fingers almost can’t turn on the ignition, but when they do, I back out of my driveway—lucky my sister left her car behind at all.

Abe took just one kiss from me, one that seemed to rob me of all the warmth I had left. Shadows and light can’t be close. So when he touches me, touches me as himself and not as the vision he projects—it hurts. It rips me open, cutting through my soul. If he wanted, he could whisper to take away the pain, but he didn’t this time. This time he let me writhe as his darkness fed on me.

And then he left me crying on the bedroom floor.

I’m incredibly weak when I pull into the lot of the Sunset Motel. Harlin’s motorcycle is parked in front of his room—room 126. With considerable effort, I turn off the car, nearly dropping the keys as I climb out. I stumble to his door and put my hand against it, fingers spread to rest for a second.

I knock softly.

When the door opens, Harlin is there in just his boxers, his hair messy from sleep. He looks stunned to see me.

“Elise, what’s wrong?” He brings me in quickly, locking the door behind us. His room isn’t nearly as neat as it was the first time I came to his motel. Pages from his sketch pad are scattered on the bed, crumples of paper on the floor.

Although my teeth chatter, warmth is slowly returning, the light never truly abandoning me. Even now it pulses under my skin with energy.

Harlin watches, filled with concern, and I remember everything about us. How he cried for me on the bridge, how he kissed me just yesterday. Harlin found me. Harlin will always find me.

There’s too much between us, secrets and lies, but beyond that is unconditional love and the belief that we’re meant only for each other. No matter how short that time is.

I step forward and wrap my arms around Harlin, resting my head against his chest. He staggers a step at first, but then he hugs me back tightly, like he’ll never let me go again.

“I remember,” I whisper into his skin. “I remember everything.”

Harlin lays his cheek on the top of my head, but doesn’t respond. Instead he holds me close, strong and protective. I close my eyes, sad about what I have to say next.

“I saw Lucy,” I tell him.

There’s a long silence. “And?” he asks.

“She’s a Shadow.” I choke on the words. Despite what Lucy has become, she’s still my sister. Only now she’s left to rot, having been convinced to turn her back on hope. “Abe turned her,” I say. “And then he came for me. He kissed me.”