Forever Too Far (Page 39)
BLAIRE
I needed to get out of the house. Rush didn’t want me taking Nate anywhere and since I was Nate’s walking food source then we couldn’t be separated long. He still refused to take a bottle. I had tried pumping and feeding him but it wasn’t working. He just wanted me. Which was sweet but his daddy was so dang overprotective he got pissy if people came over and wanted to hold him.
I was worried that by the time my six weeks were up and it was okay for us to have sex again he was going to be impossible to live with. I needed to do something to take the edge off or he was going to explode.
The first week staying home was easy. I was tired and Nate didn’t sleep a lot at night so I wasn’t physically able to go out during the day. I had felt bad about not going to Mr. Kerrington’s funeral. Woods was my friend and I hated that he’d lost his father so unexpectedly. Rush assured me that Woods would be fine after I burst into tears once I heard the news. I didn’t know Mr. Kerrington so my only excuse for crying was that I was having hormonal issues called the baby blues. Or at least that is what my doctor told me.
The uncontrollable need to cry went away the day I was able to fasten my pre-baby jeans with no problem. I had gone into Nate’s room and rocked him for an hour while he slept which was something his pediatrician had told me not to do. It would spoil him. It was just so hard at times. I wanted to remember these days. He would be running around the house soon enough.
When Nate turned a month old I put my foot down and told Rush it was time we went somewhere with him. Rush agreed that he had to get over it and we spent over an hour getting all his supplies together just to go eat dinner at the club. By the time we got home I was so tired I figured that maybe it wasn’t worth it. We could just stay home until he was weaned. Then at that thought I promptly burst into tears because I was an awful mother.
Rush took Nate and put him to bed for me while I went to get a shower. I was behind on sleep. I needed to stop nursing Nate at night like his pediatrician suggested but I’d been weak and kept giving in. I had to stop it.
I stepped out of the shower and stood in front of the mirror. My hips were wider now. I was positive they would always be like this. I was wearing all my pre pregnancy clothes but I didn’t look like I used to look. My body was a mom body now.
“Damn. I’ve been trying not to look at you naked because I’m trying real hard not to resort to taking matters into my own hands but fuck... you’re gorgeous.”
Hearing the desire in his voice did wonders for my self-esteem. I wanted to feel sexy again. I wanted sex again. We had two more weeks until my doctor’s appointment. I wasn’t sure I could last that long.
I turned around and walked over to him. Sex might be off limits but me making sure my man was happy wasn’t. I leaned up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to his and then bit down on his bottom lip. I was tired of being sweet and romantic. I wanted to be bad.
I pulled his shirt off and kissed down his chest smiling to myself as his breath hitched and he grabbed a hold of my hair. I unsnapped his jeans and pushed them down around his ankles along with his boxers. His erection stood out proudly and my mouth watered. He was so gorgeous. Even this part of him was a turn on. Slipping one hand around the base of his cock I slid the tip into my mouth and pressed it in until the head hit the back of my throat.
“Holy fucking shit, Blaire,” Rush groaned, falling against the doorframe for support. He buried both his hands in my hair and held me there. I pulled back letting his cock spring free of my mouth with a pop and then teased the head with my tongue. His curses and moans only made me hotter.
“Suck it, please God, baby, suck it deep again,” he begged, pushing my head down over him until the head once again slid into my throat. I gagged and enjoyed the groan of pleasure coming from Rush. He was enjoying hearing me gag. I was turning myself on.
I dropped my hand to slip between my legs and let Rush control how much of his cock went into my mouth with his grip on my hair. “Fucking hell, are you touching yourself?” he asked, panting as he pulled back out of my mouth.
I stuck my tongue out and let his head slide off it before nodding. Then I opened my mouth wide and stared up at him while he directed it back into my mouth. “I want to play with that pussy,” Rush growled. “Don’t come.”
I was very close to coming so I wasn’t sure I could promise him that. He began moving in and out of my mouth faster. His breathing quickened and his cursing got worse. I was about to explode.
I sucked down hard on him and pumped him in and out of my mouth. I felt him tighten in against my tongue and both of his hands grabbed the back of my head. I heard the roar building inside him just before the first warm burst hit the back of my throat.
“Holy shit, baby. Suck it, take it... yeah, take it... motherfucker that’s incredible,” he chanted as his body jerked under my hands and mouth.
My thighs were soaked from my excitement. I started to slip a hand down there again when Rush pulled me off his cock and picked me up and carried me to the bed and threw me down on it. I knew we weren’t supposed to have sex yet but right now I didn’t really care. I felt healed down there. Nothing felt different.
Rush pushed my legs apart and then his head lowered and his tongue darted out to lick the wetness on the inside of my legs. I trembled, as he got closer to my heat. “I’m gonna eat this sweet pussy until you’re begging me to stop,” he threatened just before he slid his tongue between my folds and then flicked his piercing over my clit. I loved the way he did that. It had been awhile. I grabbed at his hair and held him over my clit. He chuckled and the vibration made me cry out in pleasure.
“My greedy little girl,” he murmured pressing kisses near my entrance before sliding his tongue inside me and rubbing my clit with the pad of his thumb. My first orgasm hit me hard and I pulled at his hair, which made him growl hungrily and continue to lap at me.
“I want more,” he whispered, grinning up at me wickedly. My legs felt like noodles as I let them fall open. “That’s it. Open up,” he praised me. God, I would do anything this man wanted.
In my pleased, relaxed state his thumb slid inside of me and out. Then he let it run back until he found another hole. One I wasn’t sure I wanted touched.
“Don’t tense up. I won’t hurt you. Just let me make it feel good,” he promised. I relaxed, trusting him as he slid the tip of his thumb inside me while teasing my clit with his tongue. I caught myself pushing back on his thumb trying to get it deeper and Rush groaned in approval as he kept working his thumb in and out of my ass while he made love to me with his tongue.
There was a new kind of orgasm building. I didn’t understand it but it was stronger. I wanted it. “Rush, I need,” I begged, not sure what I needed.
He slipped his thumb back into my wet warmth then slid it backwards again to tuck it into the tight hole that was driving me crazy. “I know what you need, sweet Blaire and I’m gonna give it to you,” he said before licking me from my clit back to the small hole he was so intent to play with. His tongue circled the hole before going back to my clit and pulling it into his mouth while slipping his thumb inside me.
I shot off. Fireworks exploded inside me and I screamed Rush’s name over and over while my body spasmed from the pure pleasure coursing through me. I’d never felt anything like it. There were no words to describe it.
When I finally came back down to earth and managed to open my eyes Rush was crawling back over my body to lie beside me and pull me against him. “I need to fuck you, Blaire. I need in so damn bad,” he whispered.
I wanted him inside me. I just wasn’t sure if I wanted him inside me... back there. His thumb was much smaller than his cock.
“I want in your pussy, baby. Stop worrying over the other. That was just for you. I knew it would feel good,” he assured me, then covered us both up with the quilt and I quickly fell asleep against his warm body.