Redeem Me (Kin #6)(8)
Author: Jennifer Foor

“Good to see you as well, kid. Are you about ready to get going? Your mother has a whole list for us to do today.” He put his hand on my shoulder and smiled, but it was nothing like the bear hugs he used to give me.

Just as suspected my father cut out his kind act as soon as we climbed into his truck. I hadn’t even buckled my seatbelt before he started on me. “We need to go pick up your brother. I’m telling you right now that I don’t want any drama between you two this weekend. This is about your sister. Your mom is already pissed off that she knows about it. Something else just might set her over the edge, and I’m not in the mood to deal with it.”

“I have no beef with Shayne, dad. We’re cool.”

“You say that now, but I’ve seen you around the twins, Parker. You can fool everyone else, but I know that you lose your shit when you’re around them.”

“Do we have to talk about this now? I’m tellin’ you that it ain’t goin’ to be a problem. Cam is with me, and she don’t need to know what went down with all of that. It’s been settled. Shayne’s got his family, and that’s the end of it.”

“One day you’re going to regret your decision. What then, Parker?”

It was the same argument as every single time I was around this man. It was as if he wanted me to admit that giving up the twins was a mistake. Still to this day, I didn’t regret it. Those kids were being raised by my brother, as his own. He loved them as their father, and that gave me all of the peace that I’d ever look for. It was plainly obvious that I wasn’t prepared to be a father. I get that accidents happen and people get through it, but Ashley and I weren’t even friends. The only reason she kept that pregnancy at first was because she was trying to pawn them off as someone else’s. Had it not been for my brother stepping in there’s no telling what she would have done, or even if she would have kept them at all.

I hate to even speculate on it. Ashley had changed so much, and she and my brother had been through Hell and back. They deserved to be the happy family that they were. As much as they all like to think that I was against them, I think I was cheering for them to last more than anyone else. Someday Cameron and I would graduate college, get married, and then have a couple kids. Regardless who planted the seed in Ashley; the twins belonged to my brother. I’d vowed to myself, and to him, that I would never argue that fact, unless something happened to both of them. Shayne’s twins would still always be my niece and nephew. I’d love them forever, but not as my own children.

I think that’s what was so difficult for my parents to understand. They didn’t look at it in my perspective. All they saw was me pushing off my problem on someone else, and letting my brother pick up the pieces. In retrospect I could understand why they felt the way they did, but also knew that my choice was only going to benefit everyone. Mostly, I wanted us all to be a happy family again.

I turned to my father, as sure as I’d ever been about the subject. “They ain’t my kids. It’s as simple as that. They’ve got a dad and mom that love them like crazy. Why would I ever want to cause problems?”

“Son, I wish I could tell you the answer to that, but I just can’t anymore. Your mother and I still can’t wrap our heads around it.”

“Well it seems like you’re the ones with the problem then. I’m happy, and I’m doin’ my best to move forward. Don’t you want to get back to the way we were before?”

He was quiet for a second, rolled down the window, and lit up a smoke. “I just expected so much more out of you, maybe out of Shayne, but never you, Parker.”

“So you’re smokin’ again because of me? I’m real glad I could assist you in ruining your health. Is there anything else you want to blame me for?” I hated being sarcastic with my dad, but enough was enough. Anyone would have been frustrated. It had been two years.

They’ve had two whole years to get over it.

I understood that I was living away at college, and that they had a lot of pent up issues. The thing was, this happened every single time we did visit each other.

It was the same conversation on repeat.

“Listen here, boy. You’re lucky you’re even sitting in that seat over there. If it wasn’t for Shayne your ass wouldn’t have been invited at all.”

When everything first went down he’d severed ties with me, a lot like he’d done with Shayne in the past. It was all a ploy to make us change our ways. The thing was, after the whole falling out I’d realized more than ever that I’d made the right decision about the twins. My brother was on the birth certificate, and Ashley had a backup with a signed document from me forfeiting my rights, in case the birth certificate ever came into question. They covered all their bases, so the only thing holding onto the past was our parents.

Had my mom been in the truck he wouldn’t have pushed me the way he was. My dad always mellowed out when it came to her.

He didn’t speak to me until we pulled up in front of Shayne’s house.

My brother kissed his wife at the front door and walked out to the truck. I hopped out of the front seat to greet him. We shook hands and hugged at the same time. “What’s up, man. Long time no see.” Shayne pulled away and looked me right in the eyes. “You look good.”

“So do you. Married life must be treatin’ you well. It looks like you’ve picked up some daddy weight.” I said it loud enough so that my father would hear. He was probably behind me cringing, or possibly choking on his nicotine stick.

“Yeah, I don’t have time for the gym anymore. The kids could live on fries and macaroni, so we have it a lot.”

Shayne hopped in the front seat, leaving me to climb in the back. I was grateful, considering that he’d now have to be close to our dad, instead of me.

“How’s Cameron? Did you bring her along?” Shayne asked.

“Yeah, she’s with Peyton.”

“Don’t leave them alone too long. She’ll get baby fever,” Shayne teased.

Our father had started to pull away, but stepped on the brake, jerking our heads. “How is it that the two of you can joke about shit like this? Do either of you see how wrong it is?” He asked.

What was wrong was the fact that he couldn’t understand. “Dad… I look at it like this. Say I went to the sperm bank and donated. At some point there would be kids walkin’ around with my DNA. That doesn’t give me any rights to them, does it?”