Redeem Me (Kin #6)(9)
Author: Jennifer Foor

“This ain’t what happened, Parker. I raised you better than this.”

“Ashley may not have gone to the sperm bank, but that’s how I see it. It was a drunken night that I barely remember.”

“Those are the consequences you get for being reckless. You can’t just pass your problems to the next guy in line.” I understood his point.

“Look, dad. Nothin’ I say is goin’ to make you forgive me. Everything turned out for the best.”

“He’s right. We can sit here and be pissed at Parker, or we can get over it. I know it was a hard road, but I’ve got two children that call me their daddy. I’ve got a wife that I’d give my own life for. None of that would have happened if Parker hadn’t made that mistake. Can’t we just agree that all things happen for a reason?”

I couldn’t believe that Shayne was taking up for me, granted he had a point. I suppose it was easier for him and Ashley to look at me that way than as someone who completely f**ked up their lives for a while. No matter how I looked at it, I couldn’t seem to find a way to redeem myself for my actions. My parents would never understand, even if I spent the next fifty years proving it.

I knew I didn’t deserve it, but I just wanted to be back in their good-graces. I wanted to come around more, and have them visit me like they used to.

For the first time in my life I felt so alone. Sure, I had Cameron, but not the support of my family. It was very difficult.

Chapter 6

Cameron

Since I was left alone with Peyton for a while, I decided that it was as good time to pick her brain about what her brother could be hiding from me. Clearly something else had to have happened for their relationship to become so untethered. She was already dressed for the baby shower, seemingly in a fantastic mood. “Hey, I know it’s probably wrong for me to ask, but I’m worried about Parker. Do you know what happened between him and his dad? He used to be so close to him, and now it seems like they barely speak.”

She turned her head when she spoke to me. I knew from years of living with two lawyers what to look for as far as body language went. Peyton was about to lie to me. “My dad is a difficult man to deal with, that’s all. It ain’t nothin’ personal. He picks his favorites. It’s like he can only have one at a time. For a while it was Parker, because let’s face it, he’s the one who got the full ride to college. When the hype of that wore off, he focused all his energy on Shayne, and his little family. Now, he’s all up my ass. If I were Parker, I’d appreciate the break. My dad can be an overbearin’ ass when he wants to be.”

It was interesting how easy it was for Peyton to express that to me. If I hadn’t known that she was hiding something, I would have believed that she genuinely felt that way about her father. In some ways I secretly wondered if that’s exactly how she saw the man.

As unfortunate as that might be, my concern was Parker. Even if his father did have a convoluted way of giving his children attention, it didn’t explain the way he’d cut him off. Even his mother was in on it. Deciding that it was best to pretend that I believed her, I dropped the subject.

Later on, once we’d arrived at the party, I was drawn to the way that Parker stayed by my side. I watched his family interacting, seemingly avoiding contact with us. I wasn’t any kind of social worker, but this was clearly obvious. The animosity in the room could have been cut with a knife it was so thick. How could everyone pretend that nothing was going on?

Parker kept smiling, and watching them, as if nothing was wrong. It was weird, and I was about to come unhinged if I didn’t do something to distract myself. There was one thing that I knew was a surefire way to stay occupied. I walked away from my boyfriend and headed over to where the twins were running around chasing each other. Eli, the little boy, lost his balloon. I watched it float up to the ceiling, before hearing him start to cry. With no regard for who may be watching, I reached up and grabbed the string, returning it to the little guy. He looked up at me with bright blue, wide eyes and smiled. “Tank you.”

I bent down to be eye-level with him. “You’re welcome, cutie.”

He giggled, tilting his head as if he were being shy. “Wanna pay?”

“Do I want to play?” I looked around the room full of people that I barely knew. “Sure. I’d love to play.”

Eli took me by the hand, towing his balloon the whole time in his other hand, as he led me into a large room. A bag full of toys was already opened. He grabbed a handful of little characters and handed some to me. After checking behind me, noticing that his sister hadn’t followed, I sat down and began to pretend play with the small child.

I’d never babysat before, or even considered what it would be like to connect to a child, but as I sat there beside him I immediately felt something that had never occurred before.

I felt this longing to befriend him; to show him as much attention as I possibly could offer. Perhaps it was all derived from the lack of childhood interactions in my own life, or maybe it was just me having a longing to one day become a parent. At any rate, I was completely mesmerized by this small boy.

A few moments later his mother, Ashley, came into the room. There were certain things that she and I shared in our upbringing. We’d both been raised with a silver spoon, and had also been only children. Although we had other similarities, I’d always been reluctant to bond with her, on account of Parker being so hostile about her. It was yet another unanswered set of questions that left me curious.

“I was wondering where he’d run off to.” She sat down in front of me as if we were close friends. “This boy loves to get into things when nobody is lookin’. I’m real glad you came in here with him, otherwise we may have had marker on the walls, or maybe even urine on the carpets.” I could tell she was trying to break the ice with small talk, so I went along with it.

As much as I loved my boyfriend, I knew that all of my questions were causing problems between us. Until I could figure things out, I couldn’t see me dropping it. “Wow, I guess you really have your hands full.”

“It gets hectic, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. It helps that Shayne’s such a good father. With all of my medical history I don’t know what I would do without him.”

I nodded. “Yeah. I’ve seen how good he is with them.”

“You and Parker seem pretty serious. Have you talked about havin’ kids?” I smiled when her southern accent came into play. It wasn’t strong, but with certain words it was apparent.