Replace Me (Kin #2)(43)
Author: Jennifer Foor

After running into Megan again, in such an awful way, I started to think maybe it was meant to happen. No matter which direction I chose, I kept screwing up. Megan reminded me that I was in charge of my actions and it was my job to change, for real this time.

Lacey

School was the last thing on my mind and maybe I should have called Sky to let her know that I wouldn’t be there, because when she showed up at my house, she was freaking out.

“Lacey, I’ve tried to call you all morning. How come you weren’t in class today? It’s the one class we said we’d never miss since we were both in it.”

“I had a bad night.”

‘What do you mean? Were you sick?”

“No, worse. I kind of told Shayne that he could come over.”

“You what? Please tell me that you didn’t do something stupid?” I appreciated that she was concerned, but didn’t want to hear her tell me that she told me so. Not again.

“So what if I did? It’s not like I can take it back now.”

“What did you do? Did you sleep with him? I thought you liked Joey.”

“I do like Joey, but this was about me and Shayne. I needed to know for sure that I was making the right decision. I had to know that it was okay to walk away from him and move on.”

“So where is he now?” She sat down on the couch across from me and folded her hands. “Did he stay the night?”

I shook my head and began to cry uncontrollably. “No. He’s gone. I told him we were done, right after. He left so hurt and angry with me. Then I asked him if we could be friends. Who does that?”

“Lacey, Shayne cheated and lied to you. You’re acting like this is all your fault.”

I looked up at her, unable to accept that this had nothing to do with my actions. “Joey lied too, you know. Shayne called and Joey erased the number. He told Shayne to leave me alone. He had no right to do that, but he did. Why do I always get with guys that can’t be honest with me? I’m like a jerk magnet.”

I felt the couch move while my hands covered my face. My sobs were still uncontrolled, but Sky’s hand tried it’s best to comfort me. “You are not a jerk magnet.”

“Why can’t I find someone that wants just me? Every guy that I care about sleeps around. Maybe I just suck in bed. Maybe I can’t give them enough to keep them happy.”

“Stop saying that. Do you hear yourself? I think you need to stop looking so hard for love. It doesn’t have anything to do with you as a person.”

I nodded. “You’re right. I need to not see either of them. I should focus on school and my future and ignore guys for a while.”

We hugged and she held me tightly. “It’s going to be okay, Lace. You have me and I’ll keep you straight.”

I felt confident that she meant what she was saying. I was going to get through it and stop hoping to change two men that didn’t want to be changed.

The first thing I needed to do was tell Joey. He deserved to know why I couldn’t see him anymore. He needed to know that no matter how perfect the sex was, it was never going to be enough for us to ever be more. Joey was a means to an end. The old Lacey was gone and the new one wasn’t falling for any man’s ploys to get her into bed. She would be in control and protect her heart from being broken again.

Chapter 20

Shayne

I told myself that I was going to walk away from Lacey; that I was going to let her go this time without a fight. Unfortunately, it was easier said than done. I waited a day before I started calling her. Of course, she never answered, so I bombarded her voicemail with messages, practically pleading with her to call me back.

I went to work, came home, and thought about the things Megan had said to me. She had me hating myself, more than usual. Even Ashley, who seemed to be my only confidant, couldn’t get me out of my funk.

She made me dinner and had it waiting for me when I got home from work. After showering, I found her sitting in the kitchen with a table full of food. “Hey. I thought you might want to eat, seein’ as you probably haven’t all day.”

I sat down at the other end and ran my hands through my hair. “Yeah, thanks. I guess I didn’t even think about it.”

“You can’t keep beatin’ yourself up over it, Shayne. You tried. You went above and beyond to make things right. Maybe you should move on.”

I raised my brow and looked at her. “Please don’t give me advice, Ash. You of all people don’t have room to talk. Look what you did to try and get Ford back. We both know how that ended up.”

“It’s because of what I did that I know I’m right. Look, I don’t expect you to trust me, or be my friend, but I’m tryin’ to help. We live together and now I’m havin’ twins. The only person that’s been a constant so far is you, Shayne. I just want to make things a little better for you. Maybe if I can help you, I’ll be able to forgive myself for the things I did.”

When her over emotional hormones kicked in and she started crying, it made me feel terrible. I wasn’t the only person going through Hell. We were both suffering. As much as I wanted to hate Ash, I knew she was the only woman I could be close to without wanting something more. I stood up, walked over to her side of the table, and hugged her. “Don’t cry, Ash.” I ran my hand through her dark hair. “We’re goin’ to get through this, together. We’re a team in this. Maybe it’s best if I focus on the babies. We’ve got a long road ahead, and our families are counting on us to make the right decisions. I say we take this pity party and use it to our advantage.”

“How do you think that’s goin’ to happen?” She looked up with tears in her eyes, like I was being a fool.

“No more drama. We concentrate on bein’ good parents. We read books and shit; whatever we have to do to prepare. No more bullshit with ex’s or one-night stands. I’m done with it all.”

We stared at each other and she patted my hand. “Okay. We’ll do it together, for the babies.”

“For the babies,” I repeated.

I stood up and walked over to my seat, admiring the casserole sitting in the middle of the table. “So, what did you make?”

“It’s Mexican. I got it off one of those shows. I’m just warnin’ you, it might taste like ass. I’ve never been good at cooking.”

I put a piece on my plate and took a bite. “It’s pretty good for bein’ ass.” I winked and saw her smiling at me.