Song of Susannah (Page 16)

Well, no, she hadn’t quite finished that last part, but Trudy was sure that was what the woman had meant to say. Only then her face had changed. Like a comic getting ready to imitate Bill Clinton or Michael Jackson or maybe even George Clooney. And she’d asked for help. Asked for help and said her name was…what?

"Susannah Dean," Trudy said. "That was the name. I never told Officer Antassi."

Well, yeah, but f**k Officer Antassi. Officer Antassi with his bus shelters and little stores, justfuck him.

That woman – Susannah Dean, Whoopi Goldberg, Coretta Scott King, whoever she was – thought she was pregnant. Thought she was inlabor.I’m almost sure of it. Did she look pregnant to you, Trudes?

"No," she said.

On the uptown side of Forty-sixth, white WALK once again became red DON ‘ T WALK. Trudy realized she was calming down. Something about just standing here, with 2 Dag Hammarskj?ld Plaza on her right, was calming. Like a cool hand on a hot brow, or a soothing word that assured you that there was nothing, absolutelynothing to feel ningly-tumb about.

She could hear a humming, she realized. A sweet humming sound.

"That’s not humming," she said as red DON ‘ T WALK cycled back to white WALK one more time (she remembered a date in college once telling her the worst karmic disaster he could imagine would be coming back as a traffic light). "That’s not humming, that’ssinging. "

And then, right beside her – startling her but not frightening her – a man’s voice spoke. "That’s right," he said. Trudy turned and saw a gentleman who looked to be in his early forties. "I come by here all the time, just to hear it. And I’ll tell you something, since we’re just ships passing in the night, so to speak – when I was a young man, I had the world’s most terrible case of acne. I think coming here cleared it up, somehow."

"You think standing on the corner of Second and Forty-sixth cleared up your acne," she said.

His smile, only a small one but very sweet, faltered a tiny bit. "I know it sounds crazy – "

"I saw a woman appear out of nowhere right here," Trudy said. "Three and a half hours ago, I saw this. When she showed up, she had no legs from the knees down. Then she grew the rest of em. So who’s crazy, my friend?"

He was looking at her, wide-eyed, just some anonymous time-server in a suit with his tie pulled down at the end of the work-day. And yes, she could see the pits and shadows of old acne on his cheeks and forehead. "This is true?"

She held up her right hand. "If I’m lyin, I’m dyin. Bitch stole my shoes." She hesitated. "No, she wasn’t a bitch. I don’t believe she was a bitch. She was scared and she was barefooted and she thought she was in labor. I just wish I’d had time to give her my sneakers instead of my good goddam shoes."

The man was giving her a cautious look, and Trudy Damascus suddenly felt tired. She had an idea this was a look she was going to get used to. The sign said WALK again, and the man who’d spoken to her started across, swinging his briefcase.

"Mister!"

He didn’t stop walking, but did look back over his shoulder.

"What used to be here, back when you used to stop by for acne treatments?"

"Nothing," he said. "It was just a vacant lot behind a fence. I thought it would stop – that nice sound – when they built on the site, but it never did."

He gained the far curb. Walked off up Second Avenue. Trudy stood where she was, lost in thought.I thought it would stop, but it never did.

"Now why would that be?" she asked, and turned to look more directly at 2 Hammarskj?ld Plaza. The Black Tower. The humming was stronger now that she was concentrating on it. And sweeter. Not just one voice but many of them. Like a choir. Then it was gone. Disappeared as suddenly as the black woman had done the opposite.

No it didn’t,Trudy thought.I just lost the knack of hearing it, that’s all. If I stood here long enough, I bet it would come back. Boy, this is nuts. I’mnuts.

Did she believe that? The truth was that she did not. All at once the world seemed very thin to her, more an idea than an actual thing, and barely there at all. She had never felt less hard-headed in her life. What she felt was weak in her knees and sick to her stomach and on the verge of passing out.

Four

There was a little park on the other side of Second Avenue. In it was a fountain; nearby was a metal sculpture of a turtle, its shell gleaming wetly in the fountain’s spray. She cared nothing for fountains or sculptures, but there was also a bench.

W ALK had come around again. Trudy tottered across Second Avenue, like a woman of eighty-three instead of thirty-eight, and sat down. She began to take long, slow breaths, and after three minutes or so felt a little better.

Beside the bench was a trash receptacle with KEEP LITTER IN ITS PLACE stenciled on the side. Below this, in pink spray-paint, was an odd little graffito:See the TURTLE of enormous girth. Trudy saw the turtle, but didn’t think much of its girth; the sculpture was quite modest. She saw something else, as well: a copy of theNew York Times, rolled up as she always rolled hers, if she wanted to keep it a little longer and happened to have a bag to stow it in. Of course there were probably at least a million copies of that day’sTimes floating around Manhattan, but this one was hers. She knew it even before fishing it out of the litter basket and verifying what she knew by turning to the crossword, which she’d mostly completed over lunch, in her distinctive lilac-colored ink.

She returned it to the litter basket and looked across Second Avenue to the place where her idea of how things worked had changed. Maybe forever.

Took my shoes. Crossed the street and sat here by the turtle and put them on. Kept my bag but dumped theTimes.Why’d she want my bag? She didn’t have any shoes of her own to put in it.