To Hate Adam Connor

I arched an eyebrow. “I didn’t what?”

“You didn’t leave Aiden alone in the house.”

“Is that a question or fact?”

“Question.”

I rested my head on the headboard and closed my eyes. “That’s why I like you, Lucy Meyer. Of course I didn’t leave him alone. Dan is at the house.”

She grunted. “What exactly are you doing here if we’re not gonna have sex?”

“Like I said, I came to thank you, maybe steal another kiss while we’re at it.” I opened my eyes and turned my face to her. “Since you keep telling me I’m a bad kisser, I’m trying to improve myself.”

“And I’m your guinea pig?”

“Since you’re the only one who’s been complaining…”

“Well, go try your moves on someone else. I’m done kissing you.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Did you come here to irritate me?”

I closed my eyes again. “Did you see the articles that have been floating around? The photos of Aiden?”

I felt her hesitation, then felt the bed dip. When I looked down, I saw her lying down again, her head in line with my waist.

“Yeah. Hard to miss.”

“I’m filing for sole custody. I never want that to happen again and as long as he is with her, I know it will happen. Maybe not next month or the next, but eventually it will happen again. I still have to send him to her until the judge decides, but I think they’ll be on my side.”

“And Aiden? Have you thought about Aiden?”

“What about him?”

She turned to me and looked into my eyes. “It’s his mother, you know. He loves her. We talked, and he said he only jumped out of the car even though he knew he wasn’t supposed to because he thought she forgot about him and would be sad if she couldn’t see him anymore. Do you think he’ll be okay with only seeing her every now and then? He is just a kid, Adam. He needs his mom.”

“Do you think, even for one second, that she spends any time with him? That she is a good mom? Oh, she was. In the beginning, Aiden was her world, but then the magic disappeared. She said she couldn’t bond with him like she thought she would. She realized it wasn’t what she wanted, wasn’t who she wanted. The only reason she was on that plane to New York with Aiden was because she needed to show him off to a director so she could get a role, Lucy—which she didn’t get, by the way. I won’t let her use my son.”

My son.

He was only mine.

He’d always been only mine.

“Not having a mother sucks,” Lucy said quietly, breaking into my thoughts. “It’s not my place to say anything. I know it’s not my place to say anything, but…just before you do anything, be sure that you’re doing the right thing for Aiden, not for yourself.”

“He’ll still see her whenever he wants. I’m not trying to stop him from being with her. I just want to make sure he is safe while he is doing that.”

“You should talk about this with Aiden, not me. Ask what he’d think about staying with you full time.”

“He is five years old, not twelve.” I needed to change the subject. “I found someone to look after him. Meredith Shay. She is forty-two years old, has good credentials, and she seems like a happy person. She smiles a lot, and I like that. I think it’ll work this time, but I know Aiden would still love to see you.”

A small smile played on her lips as she looked up at the ceiling. “So I’m getting fired from the nanny job.”

“You never accepted any money, so technically it wasn’t a job.”

She grunted and dropped back on the bed. “If you’re okay with it, I’d still love to see him too.”

“You love him,” I pointed out. “I watch how you are around him. I watch you, and I can’t take my eyes off that girl, Lucy. I’m glad you’re not worried about your curse with him.”

“Now who’s the stalker, Mr. Connor?”

I waited for her to make a snarky comment about what I’d just said, but instead we shared a heavy silence.

“I do love him,” she confirmed without hesitation. “He is just a kid. He deserves all the love he can get. And the curse doesn’t work that way. I’m allowed to love my friends and be loved by them, and Aiden is my best friend at the moment because Olive is pissing me off. Kinda. But not really.” She sighed. “I just can’t fall in love with someone who has a dick. As long as I don’t care about a guy too much, I’ll be fine. I’ll be different from them. I won’t be like them. The curse will end with me.”

Them being her grandmother and mom. Bullshit, I thought to myself. She was as unique as it could get, and with every passing day, with every smile and unabashed laugh, every smirk and scowl thrown my way, I was starting to like her even more.

“I think your heart is broken, Lucy,” I said, something I was sure she already knew and tried her very best to hide from everyone around her. Or maybe she wasn’t even aware of it after all this time.

She didn’t look at me, but I caught the sudden rigidity to her body. I’d struck a nerve; that was good. “I think they broke your heart a very long time ago, and you’ve been walking around, not sure what to do with it, not sure who you can trust to take care of it, ever since you were a little kid.”

Very carefully she rested her arms against her stomach and clasped her hands together tightly.

“And I think it’s time for you to get the hell out.”

She had a beauty mark just below her right eye, so close to her lashes. I’d seen it that first day I’d grabbed her wrist and held her close to my body. Like everything else about her, even that small, inconspicuous dot intrigued me. My eyes found it, and I stifled the urge to reach out and feel it with the tip of my finger.

“I’m not saying it to make you upset, Lucy,” I said softly.

“You’re not making me upset, Adam,” she retorted.

“That’s good then,” I said when it was clear she was shutting down on me.

I dropped my legs down, ready to leave her to her thoughts and get back to Aiden so Dan could leave for the night. Then my eyes focused on hers, and I changed my mind. Mind you, she wasn’t looking at me or anything. Her eyes were still focused on the ceiling, and I realized I didn’t like that. I didn’t like that I was the one who had caused that stiffness in her body when I wanted nothing more than to melt that same body under my hands. But she wasn’t ready for it. Not yet. She would be. But not yet.

So, instead of getting up and leaving, I twisted my body so I could get close to her, placed my hand next to her shoulder, leaned down, and stopped when my lips were close enough that she could easily feel my hot breath against her skin. She didn’t move a muscle, but more importantly, she didn’t stop me.

I sighed and reached out to touch the beauty mark under her eye. She had more of them, one on the tip of her nose, one close to her lip, one right under it hidden by the shadow her lip casted…just like she was hiding her heart.

“What did you wrap around your heart to protect yourself, beautiful girl?” I asked, letting my fingertip trail down from her cheek to her chin. Her eyes cut to mine, and I knew I had her attention. “I see you unwrap it, whatever it is you have around your heart, so I know it’s there. You change when you are with your friends, with Aiden, but as soon as you can, you wrap it back up. I hope it’s not a steel cage, Lucy. I hope you’re being gentle with your heart, taking care of it for me.”