To Love Jason Thorn (Page 15)

It had felt like we were right for each other until he decided to slowly tear me down and mold me into something I wasn’t ever going to be.

He quirked his brow. “Are you sure? You didn’t look like someone who had seen her long lost brother to me down there.”

“Why do you do this to me?” I asked, genuinely curious.

He tilted his head. “What do you mean?”

“Question my every move. Undermine my decisions. Make me feel like I couldn’t possibly do anything right in your eyes. I published a book, Marcus. People are actually reading it. A lot of people are reading it. A fucking movie studio wants to option my book. Why can’t you be happy with me? For me? Why are you bringing me down like this?”

“That’s not what I’m doing, Liv,” he said, coming to sit down next to me. He lifted his hand as if he was about to grip my thigh, but then let it rest on the bed, next to my knee. “You lost so much weight while you were trying to write this book. Hell, sometimes you didn’t even have time to shower before your classes, let alone hang out with me. Our relationship ended because of this book, because you were more in love with your fictional characters than you were with me. Even when you are not writing, you are lost in your dreams.”

“That’s not why it ended, Marcus. I’d been writing this book for years, long before you, but you already knew that. When we started something, you knew how much it meant to me, finishing this book.”

“Maybe that’s what you want to believe, but it’s not what happened, Liv. I thought once you published, you would take things easier, patch things up between us, but now I can see that it’s changing you for the worse.”

Shocked, I responded, “I’ve skipped one single class. How could it possibly have changed me, Marcus? And even if I was skipping classes left and right, you also know that I’m enough on top of my classes that I’m graduating early.” Neither one of us said anything for a short time. Then I softened my voice and tried again. “Did I unknowingly do something that would make you think like this? If that’s the case, if I did something or said something that hurt you, I’m sorry. No matter what happened between us, you know I care about you.”

“I cared about you too, Livy.”

Past tense.

He rose from his seat and stopped by the door. “When you decide to come back to reality, I really hope it won’t be already too late.”

“I’m sorry to hear you think like this, Marcus. Truly, I am.”

When I didn’t say what he was obviously expecting me to say, he nodded curtly and left me alone in my room.

Feeling slightly angry at him for somehow managing to pull me down when I had every right to feel excited about my accomplishment, I jumped out of my bed, pulled the drapes shut, and turned off the lights.

When I was comfortably snuggled under my covers, I closed my eyes and tried to ignore the fact that Marcus still had enough power over me to get under my skin.

Soon enough, I fell into a fitful sleep where I was still a little girl who dreamed and wished for things she could never reach.

***

When a door slammed shut with enough force to wake the dead, I startled awake with a gasp. Catching my breath, I had to blink a few times to get my bearings and realize that I was in Los Angeles and not in my childhood home. Patting the bed in search of my phone, I gave up when I couldn’t find it and instead got up to check on Lucy.

“Lucy,” I whispered and knocked on her door quietly. When there was no answer, I opened it and saw she was already deep in sleep. Closing her door, I padded down to the kitchen to grab a water bottle and get back to my room before I came face to face with Marcus, just in case he was the one who had slammed his door.

When I was safely back in my room, I turned on the lights and finally found my lost phone down on the floor by the bed.

Seeing the two notifications for new text messages from Jason, my heart decided it was time to have a heart attack. I hugged the phone to my chest, took a deep breath, and exhaled. Wanting to be alone in the dark, I turned off the lights again and got back in bed. My phone was still tightly clasped in my hands.

Just like it was years and years ago, I thought.

Now that there was nobody around and I was all alone with my thoughts, everything that had happened that day seemed like a dream. Seeing Jason’s name light up my screen was doing inexpressible things to my heart.

Before I could work myself into hyperventilation, I opened his texts.

Jason: I can see why you didn’t want me to read this.

Oh shit!

Jason: Are you awake?

My heart stuttered to an almost stop.

Does he hate it?

He hates it.

The last text had been sent fifteen minutes ago.

I contemplated saying, Yes, I’m awake, but decided against it. We had seen each other, talked to each other enough for a day. I didn’t want him to see me as the old Olive who trailed after him to get his attention.

If he wanted to say how much he hated my book, tomorrow was just as good as any day.

Chapter Nine

Olive

Someone poked my cheek. “Wakey wakey, sleepyhead. It’s time to get up.”

“Go away,” I murmured, digging my head deeper into my pillow.

“It’s almost nine o’clock,” whined Lucy above me. “You have to get up.”

I opened my eyes and saw Lucy’s upturned face looming over me with an overly bright smile. Quickly, I closed my eyes shut.

“You’re like those annoying house cats we always watch on Facebook,” I mumbled. “Why do I have to get up? I don’t have a class today.”

“Because we need to get out and celebrate yesterday’s meeting. And I’m not a cat—I’m offended, woman. I’m a cute puppy everyone wants to take home.”

Unable to stop myself, I yawned again and reluctantly opened my eyes. Thankfully, she was no longer inches away from my face.

“What time is it?”

“Nine.”

“We’re celebrating at nine in the morning? Whose brilliant idea was that? I’m gonna say no. Come back at a reasonable hour.”

“Come on, Olive.” She pulled at my covers. “You don’t have a class, but I do. So get up, get up, get up.”

“Jesus, you are like a five-year-old.”

“If you don’t want me to dump a bucket of cold water on you, you’ll get up, get yourself together, and be by the door in less than half an hour.”

“Fine,” I snapped as I swung my legs down and pushed at her shoulder. “Get out of my way.”

She clapped her hands. “That’s the spirit I was looking for!”

In twenty minutes, I was all ready to go out, but neither Lucy nor Char were ready.

“I’m about to go out and celebrate on my own,” I yelled, standing by the front door.

“I’m coming!” Lucy yelled at the same moment Char opened her door and slipped out of her room.

“You have a class, too, Char?” I asked, noticing the big bundle of books she was carrying.

“Unfortunately, yes. Then I have another study session with the girls.”

“You sure are working hard lately. Is there anything I can help with?” Char was a shy and sweet blonde who was an English major like me, but unlike me, she had no interest in creative writing.

“That’s nice of you to ask with everything you’ve got going on. I might take you up on that offer when finals are getting closer.”