With Every Heartbeat
I sniffed back tears when Ten tried to hand me his shirt. “I’m okay.” I didn’t want his shirt. I just wanted Quinn. I must’ve said that aloud, because he sighed.
“I’ll call him. But first I’m calling the campus cops.”
Cops, questions, having to tell someone what had just happened to me did not sound appealing at all. “No.” I shook my head. “I just want Quinn.”
I turned away from him and hurried toward the door. “Blondie!” Ten called after me, his voice irritated. “Damn it. Wait.”
I hurried out into the party, pausing when the noise and people assaulted my senses. Panic nearly took me under. So many people, no space. But through the horde, I spotted him. Quinn. My lifeline. My heart and soul. The relief of seeing his face nearly buckled me.
I gasped his name, but he lurched to a stop, staring at me until his face drained of color. Next to him, Cora folded her arms over her chest and smiled as if proud of herself. Quinn looked past me to Ten, who was still struggling to get his shirt on. Then he began to shake his head.
“No,” I said, when I realized what he thought. “Quinn!”
Her voice tore into me, slashed open my guts and left me bleeding. Even though she pleaded for me to stop, I kept going, picking up my pace. Things seemed to tilt sideways in my path and I wanted to reach out for the wall to catch my balance, but I didn’t want her to see how much this had just devastated me. I would walk away from her without any kind of assistance.
Shoving my way outside, I hit the open night air and sucked in a clean breath. But I still felt nauseated. I wanted to rip out every horrible sensation bubbling inside me and just throw it all away. When I reached the end of the block, I heard her again. “Quinn, please! Wait.”
A half sob, half growl left my lips. I sounded like a wounded animal who’d just had a limb ripped off by a predator and was still trying to escape for its life, warning everyone away with a snarl and at the same time trying to lick its wounds.
As the park approached, I heard the heels of her sexy tall boots clacking against the sidewalk behind me as she hurried to catch up. The sound was so feminine and sweet, and Zoey, it made my heart wrench again.
“Quinn, you know me.” She was crying.
“Please.” She caught my arm. “Would you just stop and look at me.”
I stopped and whirled around so fast she gasped and cringed away from me. I gnashed my teeth because every instinct inside me wanted to reassure her and apologize for spooking her.
“Damn it,” I muttered and spun away again, veering to the left so I could pace into the park. “Damn it.” I clutched my hair and walked into a tight circle before bending at the waist and trying to exhale all the pressure pent up in my chest.
“Quinn?” Her voice was timid as she slowly approached.
I dropped my hands to my sides and looked at her, suddenly numb and blank.
She stopped a few feet away and wiped the tears off her cheeks before hugging herself. “Why are you acting this way?” she finally asked, confusion and pain filling her expression. “You know I would never betray you, could never betray you.”
A moment later, Zoey gingerly sat on the opposite end of the bench. I could feel her sitting so close and yet so far away. Everything in me that loved her strained her way, begging me to just reach out and gather her into my arms. But I stayed cold and hard and kept myself the entire length of the bench away from her.
She sniffed, letting me know she was still crying. “You don’t believe me, do you?” Her voice trembled. “You think Ten and I...”
I swallowed and my throat felt like it was on fire. “I believe you,” I finally said, my voice so hoarse, I’m surprised she heard me.
But she must’ve heard because she said, “Then why are you still all the way over there?”
I thought about it for a second longer, then I scrubbed the heels of my hands over my face hard and sat up straight. When I turned to her, she looked about as awful as I felt.