I've Got Your Number (Page 50)
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 48
- Page 49
- Page 49
- Page 50
- Page 50
- Page 51
- Page 51
- Page 52
- Page 52
- Page 53
- Page 53
- Page 54
- Page 54
- Page 55
- Page 55
- Page 56
- Page 56
- Page 57
- Page 57
- Page 58
- Page 58
- Page 59
- Page 59
- Page 60
- Page 60
- Page 61
- Page 61
- Page 62
- Page 62
- Page 63
- Page 63
- Page 64
- Page 64
- Page 65
- Page 65
- Page 66
- Page 66
- Page 67
- Page 67
- Page 68
- Page 68
- Page 69
- Page 69
- Page 70
- Page 70
- Page 71
- Page 71
- Page 72
- Page 72
- Page 73
- Page 73
- Page 74
- Page 74
- Page 75
- Page 75
- Page 76
- Page 76
- Page 77
- Page 77
- Page 78
- Page 78
- Page 79
- Page 79
- Page 80
- Page 80
- Page 81
- Page 81
- Page 82
- Page 82
- Page 83
- Page 83
- Page 84
- Page 84
- Page 85
- Page 85
- Page 86
- Page 86
- Page 87
- Page 87
- Page 88
- Page 88
- Page 89
- Page 89
- Page 90
- Page 90
- Page 91
- Page 91
- Page 92
- Page 92
- Page 93
- Page 93
- Page 94
- Page 94
- Page 95
- Page 95
- Page 96
- Page 96
- Page 97
- Page 97
- Page 98
- Page 98
- Page 99
- Page 99
- Page 99
- Page 100
- Page 100
- Page 100
- Page 101
- Page 101
- Page 101
- Page 102
- Page 102
- Page 102
- Page 103
- Page 103
- Page 103
- Page 104
- Page 104
- Page 104
- Page 105
- Page 105
- Page 105
- Page 106
- Page 106
- Page 106
- Page 107
- Page 107
- Page 107
- Page 108
- Page 108
- Page 108
- Page 109
- Page 109
- Page 109
- Page 110
- Page 110
- Page 110
- Page 111
- Page 111
- Page 111
- Page 112
- Page 112
- Page 112
- Page 113
- Page 113
- Page 113
- Page 114
- Page 114
- Page 114
- Page 115
- Page 115
- Page 115
- Page 116
- Page 116
- Page 116
- Page 117
- Page 117
- Page 117
- Page 118
- Page 118
- Page 118
- Page 119
- Page 119
- Page 119
- Page 120
- Page 120
- Page 120
- Page 121
- Page 121
- Page 121
- Page 122
- Page 122
- Page 122
- Page 123
- Page 123
- Page 123
- Page 124
- Page 124
- Page 124
- Page 125
- Page 125
- Page 125
- Page 126
- Page 126
- Page 126
- Page 127
- Page 127
- Page 127
- Page 128
- Page 128
- Page 128
- Page 129
- Page 129
- Page 130
- Page 130
- Page 131
- Page 131
- Page 131
- Page 132
- Page 132
- Page 132
- Page 133
- Page 133
- Page 133
- Page 134
- Page 134
- Page 134
- Page 135
- Page 135
- Page 135
- Page 136
- Page 136
- Page 136
- Page 137
- Page 137
- Page 137
- Page 138
- Page 138
- Page 138
I’ve Got Your Number(50)
Author: Sophie Kinsella
“I would ask Magnus, but I gather it’s more your area than his.”
“Fire away.” I smile up at him politely, expecting some weddingy question along the lines of ‘How many bridesmaids will there be?’ or ‘What flowers are you having?’ or even, ‘Were you surprised when Magnus proposed?’
“What do you think of McDowell’s new book on the Stoics?” His eyes are fixed beadily on mine. “How does it compare to Whittaker? “
For a moment I’m too poleaxed to react. What? What do I think of what ?
“Ah yes!” Wanda is nodding vigorously. “Poppy is somewhat of an expert on Greek philosophy, Paul. She foxed us all at Scrabble with the word aporia, didn’t you?”
Somehow I manage to keep smiling.
Aporia.
That was one of the words Sam texted me. I’d had a few glasses of wine and was feeling pretty confident by then. I have a hazy memory of myself laying down the tiles and saying that Greek philosophy was one of my great interests.
Why? Why, why, why? If I could go back in time, that’s the moment I’d go up to myself and say, “Poppy! Enough!”
“That’s right!” I attempt an easy smile. “Aporia! Anyway, I wonder where the vicar is—”
“We were reading the TLS this morning”—Antony ignores my attempt to divert the conversation—“and there was a review of this new McDowell book and we thought, now, Poppy will know about this subject.” He looks expectantly at me. “Is McDowell correct about fourth-century virtues?”
I give an internal whimper. Why the hell did I pretend I knew about Greek philosophy? What was I thinking ?
“I haven’t quite got to the McDowell book yet.” I clear my throat. “Although obviously it’s on my reading list.”
“I believe Stoicism has often been misunderstood as a philosophy, isn’t that right, Poppy?”
“Absolutely.” I nod, trying to look as knowledgeable as possible. “It’s completely misunderstood. Very much so.”
“The Stoics weren’t emotionless, as I understand it.” He gestures with his hands as though lecturing to three hundred people. “They simply valued the virtue of fortitude. Apparently they displayed such impassiveness to hostility that their aggressors wondered if they were made of stone.”
“Extraordinary!” says Paul with a laugh.
“That’s correct, isn’t it, Poppy?” Antony turns to me. “When the Gauls attacked Rome, the old senators sat in the forum, calmly waiting. The attackers were so taken aback by their dispassionate attitude, they thought they must be statues. One Gaul even tugged the beard of a senator, to check.”
“Quite right.” I nod confidently. “That’s exactly it.”
As long as Antony just keeps talking and I keep nodding, then I’ll be OK.
“Fascinating! And what happened next?” Paul turns expectantly to me.
I glance at Antony for the answer—but he’s waiting for me too. And so is Wanda.
Three eminent professors. All waiting for me to tell them about Greek philosophy.
“Well!” I pause thoughtfully, as though wondering where to begin. “Well, now. It was … interesting. In many, many ways. For philosophy. And for Greece. And for history. And humanity. One could, in fact, say that this was the most significant moment in Greek … ness.” I come to a finish, hoping no one will realize I haven’t actually answered the question.
There’s a puzzled pause.
“But what happened ?” says Wanda, a little impatiently.
“Oh, the senators were massacred, of course,” says Antony with a shrug. “But what I wanted to ask you, Poppy, was—”
’That’s a lovely painting!” I cry desperately, pointing to a picture hanging on a pillar. “Look over there!”
“Ah, now, that is an interesting piece.” He wanders over to have a look.
The great thing about Antony is, he’s so curious about everything, he’s quite easily distracted.
“I need to check something on my calendar,” I say hastily. “I’ll just … ”
My legs are shaking slightly as I escape to a nearby pew. This is a disaster. Now I’ll now have to pretend to be a Greek philosophy expert for the rest of my life. Every Christmas and family gathering, I’ll have to have a view on Greek philosophy. Not to mention be able to recite Robert Burns’s poetry.
I should never, ever have cheated. This is karma. This is my punishment.
Anyway, too late. I did.
I’m going to have to start taking notes. I take out my phone, open a new email, and start typing notes to myself.
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 48
- Page 49
- Page 49
- Page 50
- Page 50
- Page 51
- Page 51
- Page 52
- Page 52
- Page 53
- Page 53
- Page 54
- Page 54
- Page 55
- Page 55
- Page 56
- Page 56
- Page 57
- Page 57
- Page 58
- Page 58
- Page 59
- Page 59
- Page 60
- Page 60
- Page 61
- Page 61
- Page 62
- Page 62
- Page 63
- Page 63
- Page 64
- Page 64
- Page 65
- Page 65
- Page 66
- Page 66
- Page 67
- Page 67
- Page 68
- Page 68
- Page 69
- Page 69
- Page 70
- Page 70
- Page 71
- Page 71
- Page 72
- Page 72
- Page 73
- Page 73
- Page 74
- Page 74
- Page 75
- Page 75
- Page 76
- Page 76
- Page 77
- Page 77
- Page 78
- Page 78
- Page 79
- Page 79
- Page 80
- Page 80
- Page 81
- Page 81
- Page 82
- Page 82
- Page 83
- Page 83
- Page 84
- Page 84
- Page 85
- Page 85
- Page 86
- Page 86
- Page 87
- Page 87
- Page 88
- Page 88
- Page 89
- Page 89
- Page 90
- Page 90
- Page 91
- Page 91
- Page 92
- Page 92
- Page 93
- Page 93
- Page 94
- Page 94
- Page 95
- Page 95
- Page 96
- Page 96
- Page 97
- Page 97
- Page 98
- Page 98
- Page 99
- Page 99
- Page 99
- Page 100
- Page 100
- Page 100
- Page 101
- Page 101
- Page 101
- Page 102
- Page 102
- Page 102
- Page 103
- Page 103
- Page 103
- Page 104
- Page 104
- Page 104
- Page 105
- Page 105
- Page 105
- Page 106
- Page 106
- Page 106
- Page 107
- Page 107
- Page 107
- Page 108
- Page 108
- Page 108
- Page 109
- Page 109
- Page 109
- Page 110
- Page 110
- Page 110
- Page 111
- Page 111
- Page 111
- Page 112
- Page 112
- Page 112
- Page 113
- Page 113
- Page 113
- Page 114
- Page 114
- Page 114
- Page 115
- Page 115
- Page 115
- Page 116
- Page 116
- Page 116
- Page 117
- Page 117
- Page 117
- Page 118
- Page 118
- Page 118
- Page 119
- Page 119
- Page 119
- Page 120
- Page 120
- Page 120
- Page 121
- Page 121
- Page 121
- Page 122
- Page 122
- Page 122
- Page 123
- Page 123
- Page 123
- Page 124
- Page 124
- Page 124
- Page 125
- Page 125
- Page 125
- Page 126
- Page 126
- Page 126
- Page 127
- Page 127
- Page 127
- Page 128
- Page 128
- Page 128
- Page 129
- Page 129
- Page 130
- Page 130
- Page 131
- Page 131
- Page 131
- Page 132
- Page 132
- Page 132
- Page 133
- Page 133
- Page 133
- Page 134
- Page 134
- Page 134
- Page 135
- Page 135
- Page 135
- Page 136
- Page 136
- Page 136
- Page 137
- Page 137
- Page 137
- Page 138
- Page 138
- Page 138