The Struggle (Page 33)

"You mean Damon’s still – oh, my God! Oh, Stefan, I should have given her some of the vervain. I should have realized…"

"It wouldn’t have made any difference. Believe me." She had turned toward the door as if to go after Vickie that minute, but he pulled her gently back. "Some people are more easily influenced than others, Elena. Vickie’s will was never very strong. It belongs to him, now."

Slowly, Elena sat down. "Then there’s nothing anyone can do? But, Stefan, will she become – like you and Damon?"

"It depends." His tone was bleak. "It’s not just a matter of how much blood she loses. She needshis blood in her veins to make the change complete. Otherwise, she’ll just end up like Mr. Tanner. Drained, used up. Dead."

Elena took a long breath. There was something else she wanted to ask him about, something she’d wanted to ask him for a long time. "Stefan, when you spoke to Vickie back there, I thought it was working. You were using your Powers on her, weren’t you?"

"Yes."

"But then she just went crazy again. What I mean is… Stefan, youare okay, aren’t you? Your Powers have come back?"

He didn’t answer. But that was answer enough for her. "Stefan, why didn’t you tell me? What’s wrong?"

She went around and knelt by him so that he had to look at her.

"It’s taking me a while to recover, that’s all. Don’t worry about it."

"Iam worried. Isn’t there anything we can do?"

"No," he said. But his eyes dropped.

Comprehension swept through Elena. "Oh," she whispered, sitting back. Then she reached for him again, trying to get hold of his hands. "Stefan, listen to me – "

"Elena,no. Don’t you see? It’s dangerous, dangerous for both of us, but especially for you. It could kill

"Only if you lose control," she said. "And you won’t. Kiss me."

"No," said Stefan again. He added, less harshly, "I’ll go out hunting tonight as soon as it’s dark."

"Is that the same?" she said. She knew it wasn’t. It was human blood that gave Power. "Oh, Stefan, please; don’t you see I want to? Don’tyou want to?"

"That isn’t fair," he said, his eyes tortured. "You know it isn’t, Elena. You know how much – " He turned away from her again, his hands clenched into fists.

"Then why not? Stefan, I need…" She couldn’t finish. She couldn’t explain to him what she needed; it was a need for connection to him, for closeness. She needed to remember what it was like with him, to wipe out the memory of dancing in her dream and of Damon’s arms locked around her. "I need us to be together again," she whispered.

Stefan was still turned away, and he shook his head.

"All right," Elena whispered, but she felt a wash of grief and fear as defeat seeped into her bones. Most of the fear was for Stefan, who was vulnerable without his Powers, vulnerable enough that he might be hurt by the ordinary citizens of Fell’s Church. But some of it was for herself.

Chapter Twelve

A voice spoke as Elena reached for a can on the store shelf.

"Cranberry sauce already?"

Elena looked up. "Hi, Matt. Yes, Aunt Judith likes to do a preview the Sunday before Thanksgiving, remember? If she practices, there’s less chance she’ll do something terrible."

"Like forgetting to buy the cranberry sauce until fifteen minutes before dinner?"

"Until five minutes before dinner," said Elena, consulting her watch, and Matt laughed. It was a good sound, and one Elena hadn’t heard for too long. She moved on toward the check-out stand, but after she’d paid for her purchase she hesitated, looking back.

Matt was standing by the magazine rack, apparently absorbed, but there was something about the slope of his shoulders that made her want to go to him.

She poked a finger at his magazine. "What areyou doing for dinner?" she said. When he glanced uncertainly toward the front of the store, she added, "Bonnie’s waiting out in the car; she’ll be there. Other than that it’s just the family. And Robert, of course; he should be there by now." She meant that Stefan wasn’t coming. She still wasn’t sure how things were between Matt and Stefan these days. At least they spoke to each other.

"I’m fending for myself tonight; Mom’s not feeling so hot," he said. But then, as if to change the subject, he went on, "Where’s Meredith?"

"With her family, visiting some relatives or something." Elena was vague because Meredith had been Aunt Judith’s cooking?"

"For old times’ sake?"

"For oldfriends’ sake," said Elena after a moment’s hesitation, and smiled at him.

He blinked and looked away. "How can I refuse an invitation like that?" he said in an oddly muted voice. But when he put the magazine back and followed her out he was smiling, too.

Bonnie greeted him cheerfully, and when they got home Aunt Judith looked pleased to see him come into the kitchen.

"Dinner’s almost ready," she said, taking the grocery bag from Elena. "Robert got here a few minutes ago. Why don’t you go straight on back to the dining room? Oh, and get another chair, Elena. Matt makes seven."

"Six, Aunt Judith," said Elena, amused. "You and Robert, me and Margaret, Matt and Bonnie."

"Yes, dear, but Robert’s brought a guest, too. They’re already sitting down."

Elena registered the words just as she stepped through the dining room door, but there was an instant’s delay before her mind reacted to them. Even so, sheknew; stepping through that door, she somehow knew what was waiting for her.

Robert was standing there, fiddling with a bottle of white wine and looking jovial. And sitting at the table, on the far side of the autumn centerpiece and the tall lighted candles, was Damon.