A Shade of Kiev (A Shade of Vampire #8)(7)
Author: Bella Forrest

I’d never been fond of vampires. I found it hard to trust creatures whose very existence depended on sucking the life out of others. And they were difficult to travel with. They were needy, craving human blood and complaining whenever they were given anything but. The only vampire I could stand was the captain of my ship, but perhaps that was just because I’d known him for so long.

“Tell me more about this group you’re with,” my passenger said, turning his bloody gaze on me.

“There are perhaps one hundred of us. Mostly vampires and werewolves.”

He raised a brow at my statement.

“I didn’t really end up with them by design.” I sighed. “I’ve known the captain of our troop for years. I met him soon after leaving The Sanctuary. He and a werewolf saved me from a… difficult situation. Or you could say that we all helped each other. Anyway, since then we’ve stayed together. And gradually we picked up more people along the way, until the crew became what it is today.”

“Vampires and werewolves,” he muttered. “I never knew the two races could live in harmony.”

I smirked at the notion. “Oh, they have their fair share of squabbles. But in general, vampires and werewolves can work well together … at least compared to other supernaturals. We’ve tried adding other races to our crew in the past—ogres, mermaids, ghouls—but it rarely worked out. While wolves and vamps certainly aren’t the best of friends, if they have a shared goal, they are at least functional.”

He leaned back in his seat and placed his feet up on top of an empty water barrel. There was an awkward silence as he continued to look me over. I wondered what he was thinking: whether he actually wanted to join our group, or if he was just asking questions because he was bored.

“Is it really so bad in The Sanctuary?” he asked abruptly. “From what I’ve heard, it’s a place of freedom if you’re a witch—”

I guessed that his question wasn’t asked maliciously, but it hit a nerve so raw it sent tremors tearing through my entire body.

“I’ve had enough of your questions!” The words rolled out of my mouth before I could stop them.

He fell silent.

I immediately regretted losing my temper. I’d been secretly enjoying interacting with him. Now I felt guilty.

“I’m sorry… I actually don’t mind you asking questions. It helps to pass the time. I-I’m just starting to feel tired.”

“I’m not stopping you from sleeping,” he snapped.

For some reason, I didn’t want to risk upsetting him by saying that I didn’t trust him enough to close my eyes. Perhaps I was worried it would deter him from speaking to me freely.

I questioned why I didn’t want to fall asleep. I was certainly exhausted; I hadn’t slept properly for days. Of course it was true that, although he could follow the basic direction of a compass, he didn’t know where our ultimate destination was and he needed me to oversee his navigation.

But I felt within myself a resistance that was distinct from and deeper than this. I didn’t want to waste the short period of time I had remaining with him on sleep. I doubted I’d ever meet another stranger in such short-lived circumstances again.

“No, I need to make sure you don’t steer off course. I’ll be okay.” Eager to divert the topic away from the witches’ realm, I blurted out the first thing that came to my head. “So why are your eyes red? I know I said you were born with them, but I’m guessing that’s not true since you were born a human. I’ve never seen a vampire with red eyes.”

He looked out at the ocean, almost as though ashamed of his appearance. He didn’t answer my question.

I cast my eyes out of the boat too and scanned the waters. My breath hitched as I caught sight of a tiny island, the first landmark indicating the proximity of the mermaids’ territory. We were perhaps an hour away now. A strange panic gripped me. I wasn’t used to time passing so quickly, especially not on sea journeys.

Before I could stop myself, I found myself asking, “Tell me about the human girl you fell in love with. Was she your first love?”

A muscle in his jaw twitched.

“That’s none of your business.”

“Please,” I urged, wincing at how desperate I sounded.

He frowned at me. “No, she wasn’t,” he said.

“What was her name?”

Again he scowled and kept his lips sealed.

“What’s it like to fall in love?”

He shot me a look, perhaps wondering if this was supposed to be some kind of joke. “Are you always this aggravating?”

The truth was, I felt as confused by my behavior as he looked. This wasn’t me.

But as I allowed myself to pause and search a little deeper into my soul, I realized. This was a question that I couldn’t ever discuss with anyone else without risking becoming on closer terms with them. A question that had run deep within me ever since I could remember. A question that I had never gotten out of my system. A question that would likely go unanswered for the rest of my life if I didn’t ask it of this stranger before he left my boat.

“Just answer my question… please.”

I snatched the reins from him and slowed the dolphins.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asked, anger rising in his voice.

“Answer my question,” I repeated, trying to keep the tremors of desperation out of my voice. Embarrassment rose in my cheeks.

Breathing deeply, he stood up and turned his back on me.

“It’s not worth it.”

“What do you mean?” His answer had thrown me off. “So you fear love?”

“Yes,” he said, after a pause. I was surprised by his admission. “And no. Somehow, even with the pain, it reminds you that you’re still living.”

“And what do you fear?”

He crossed his arms over his chest and remained silent for several moments. I stared at him, barely blinking.

“Numbness,” he said finally. “Now will you keep moving?”

Numbness.

Chapter 7: Kiev

I let out a sigh of relief as the shores of what appeared to be an island came into view. The sooner I rid myself of this witch, the better. I don’t know how much longer I can keep myself from clawing at her. I stepped outside the cabin to get a better look. Although the darkness was still very much prevalent, the horizon displayed signs of the sun about to peek through. I gazed up at the clear sky.