Reject Me (Kin #5)(43)
Author: Jennifer Foor

“Thanks,” I said after I’d swallowed.

“I hate seeing you like this, Peyton. You’ve got a lot going for you. You’ve got your classes, and a big family that loves you. Plus you have me and Abigail. I know you feel like you’re alone, but you’re not.”

I wiped my tears away with a tissue and looked up at him. His comfort meant the world. “Thanks, Wayne. You’re always here for me. I’ll never be able to make it up to you.”

“Being my friend is good enough.” He picked up the box of tissues and grabbed me some more. “Why don’t you go get a bath. There’s shirts and shorts in my third drawer down. Abigail and I were just about to make ice cream sundaes, so once you’re done come out and eat them with us, okay?”

I grabbed his hand before he could walk out of the room. “How did I get so lucky to find you, Wayne?”

“I was the lucky one,” he replied.

It took me a while to get up and head into the bathroom. The last thing I wanted to do was take care of myself. My whole world was turned upside down. I wanted to go to sleep for a month so that I didn’t have to feel the pain of it all.

Soaking in the hot water didn’t help at first, well not until the medication kicked in. Then I just felt calmer. It wasn’t like it stopped me from feeling, or crying. I could have filled the tub with all the tears I had left inside of me.

When I climbed out of the tub and headed back into the bedroom to get dressed I sat down on the bed wrapped in a towel, grabbed my phone out of my purse and dialed Jamey’s number. I just wanted him to explain to me what had happened for him to not want to be with me.

“This is Jamey, leave me a message.”

I waited for the tone and tried my best not to cry as I spoke. “It’s me. I don’t know what’s goin’ on. Last night you told me you loved me. I felt it. I know you weren’t lyin’. I just don’t understand what’s goin’ on. What did I do to make you push me away? Did I say something that pissed you off? Is it because I -.” The phone disconnected before I could finish. I tossed it back into my purse and buried my face into a pillow. It wasn’t like he ever listened to his messages. He told me one time that he only set it up so that people wouldn’t keep calling.

After getting myself together enough to stand up, I walked over to the full-length mirror and let the towel drop. There had to be something about me that turned Jamey off. If it wasn’t my personality, or the way I acted, then maybe he didn’t find me attractive.

The sound of the door opening made me reached down and cover myself back up. Wayne stood there in front of me. “Sorry. I was just checking on you.”

I don’t know what made me do it. I’d like to have blamed it on the pill he gave me, but I knew it had nothing to do with my actions. I let the towel drop, revealing my fully naked body to Wayne. I watched him take a deep breath and let his eyes wander. I took a step forward and reached for his hand. When he didn’t pull away I got even closer. While on my tippy toes, I reached up and kissed him on the lips. Wayne leaned against the door and fastened the latch before turning around. He pressed me onto it and picked me up in his arms. Our lips clashed together almost violently, like he’d gone too long and couldn’t control his sexual desires. I tugged on his t-shirt and easily lifted it over his head. Our mouths met again sending us in a whirlwind of kissing. I needed to feel wanted, and Wayne just longed for some kind of release. Within minutes he’d spun us around and tossed me down onto his bed. I could feel his stiff erection pressing into me as he began kissing my neck and moving downward. I reached to unfasten the buckle of his jeans and all of a sudden he froze. He looked up at me with petrified eyes and then quickly climbed off the bed. By the time I sat up he was already putting his shirt back on. “Peyton, I’m sorry. I can’t, we can’t do this.”

I covered my face with my hands. “I know. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s come over me.”

He sat down on the bed next to me and handed me the sheet to cover up with. “You’re in a real bad place. You’ve just been traumatized by your ex, and it’s only natural for you to seek out some kind of attention. I’m not mad at you.”

I reached for his hand, but he pulled away. It made my lips begin to tremble. “Oh God, please tell me that you don’t hate me now too.”

He laughed and shook his head. “Of course I don’t hate you. It’s just that I can’t do that, not with you or anyone else. It still feels like I’m cheating, and I couldn’t live with that. Peyton, I told you before how special you were to me, but we can’t be anything more than friends. I love you, but it’s not the way you need to be loved. Be honest with yourself, is it me that you want to be with, or Jamey?”

I let my head fall against his arm. “You’re right. Wayne, I’m sorry. I’d never use you. What is wrong with me?”

He looked over at me and wiped the tears off of my cheeks. “You are coping. You’ve got every right to be irrational. I won’t tell anyone.”

“Thanks. I wouldn’t want it getting out that I stripped down to nothin’ and still got rejected.” We both started to laugh. My head was pounding, and I knew I had to calm myself down. “You’re a Godsend.”

He finally grabbed my hand. “Our friendship is important to both of us, Peyton. Get dressed and come out for some ice cream. Abigail probably ate all the sprinkles by now.”

I watched him stand up and head toward the door. “Wayne?”

“Yeah?” He turned to look at me.

“Will you sleep with me tonight, like we did before? I just don’t want to be alone.”

He smiled again. “As long as you don’t snore like the last time.”

I let out a little laugh as he exited the room. He’d gotten me to do it and I was appreciative. For a moment I forgot about my problems. I needed to teach myself how to do that if I was going to be able to get through this disaster in one piece. I had to put on my big girl panties and figure out how to get over Jamey.

When it was time for bed I cuddled up next to Wayne. Though I felt awkward about what had happened between us earlier, being close to him still made me feel safe. “You can stay here as along as you want, Peyton,” Wayne whispered.

“I don’t want Abigail to get the wrong idea.”

“She knows we’re friends. She asks me almost every day.”