Come to Me Softly (Closer to You #2)(15)
Author: A.L. Jackson

Sitting there that night, I’d felt it—the fantasy Aly and I had been living getting ready to come to an end. The end had come just hours later.

Roughing a shaky hand over my head, I tried to quell the sudden suffocating impulse that screamed at me to bolt. To run.

I’d been running so long, it was the only thing I knew how to do.

My chest jerked as I sucked in a breath.

God, I was a f**king disaster. A nightmare. I couldn’t even walk into a building without feeling like I might lose my goddamned mind. It was just a building. A place that meant nothing. The only thing harbored here were memories.

But it was memories that chased me. Memories I could never escape. Memories of what I’d done. Every single one of them seemed to lead my mind back to the greatest mistake I’d ever made.

As if Aly sensed my unease, she stilled and slowly turned around to face me. Concern drew her brows together. In the second she turned and caught my expression, it was like she immediately saw inside me, understood the war I’d fought three months ago. Like she knew how f**king badly I’d wanted to stay, all the while knowing the only choice I had was to leave.

Like she knew I’d had to run because I still hadn’t come to the place where I fully grasped what she meant to me. The significance of what we were.

Green eyes caressed my face and settled on my gaze.

She also understood why I hadn’t run far.

And in the end, I just came running back to her.

Tender fingers brushed down my cheek. “If you don’t want to be here, just say so, and we’ll go home,” she offered.

Home.

Even when I’d destroyed mine so long ago, Aly was willing to build a new one with me.

I pushed the heaviness from my lungs and reached out to twist a single lock of silken hair around my index finger. Anchored myself to her. An unseen connection traveled through it, a bond that tethered us together. My spirit stirred as I looked down at the complete selflessness staring up at me.

And right then, I knew I had to remember I’d run into Christopher here, too, six months ago, the first time I’d come back to Phoenix. That not all the shit that’d happened here was bad. Maybe, like Aly had said, that meeting was supposed to happen and this little bar hadn’t just been some random place I pulled into.

I had to believe she was supposed to happen.

Aly leaned into me, and I sighed and dropped my forehead to hers. “No, baby, I’m good. Let’s get you some dinner, pay those dues we owe your brother, then we’ll go home.”

I tugged a little at the tuft of wound-up hair.

Relief mellowed the concern that had clouded her eyes. “You sure?”

“Yeah. I could use a beer and a burger myself.”

She searched my face again, before she let whatever was worrying her go. Because she could see I’d let my worry go, too.

She smiled and laced her fingers in mine.

“Well, since I can’t have a beer, I’m going to have a double burger.” She raised a teasing brow, and I chuckled and tugged her around to my front.

I dropped a soft kiss to the top of her head. “A double burger it is, baby.”

We headed deeper into the darkened bar. The place was packed, the noise level high. Busier than I’d ever seen it. Dim lights from above cast a faint glow over the crowded room. Televisions flickered from where they were hung high on the walls, subtitles playing along the bottom while music blared from the speakers.

We shoved through, making our way over to where Cash and his new girl waited for us in a large, horseshoe booth.

Christopher slid into the free side first and around to the inside. Aly scooted down beside him, sitting directly across from Cash and the little dark-haired girl tacked onto his side. On a heavy exhale, I sat down beside Aly, didn’t give it a second’s thought when I immediately draped my arm over her shoulder.

All right, so maybe a second’s thought, because I was feeling some kind of f**king pride or some shit, sitting next to her like that.

A contented sigh seeped from her, and she resituated herself to rest her head in the crook of my neck.

Joy pushed at my chest.

“How’s it goin’, old man?” Christopher tossed out, grinning at Cash.

“Don’t even start. I’m only three months older than your lame ass.” He wagged his brow and pulled his girlfriend closer. “Besides, what’s that they say, men only get better with age?”

Aly rolled playful eyes. “Seriously, Cash, that only applies to men . . . not boys pretending to be men. Ask us again when you turn forty-three.”

Christopher cackled and high-fived Aly. “That’s my girl.”

“You two suck,” Cash said, laughing as he got more comfortable in his seat.

I’d only met Cash once when he’d stopped by the apartment during the summer. He was cool enough, a whole lot like Christopher, indifferent, approaching life with outright apathy.

Which I guess was why it surprised me when he introduced us to Fiona. She was tiny. Prim and straitlaced. She waved to us with a shy hand and a blushing face as she burrowed further into Cash’s side with just the mention of her name. I could only imagine she was feeling completely out of place and unprepared for Cash and Christopher.

I doubted few people could be prepared for the two of them.

And I suppose I was even harder to take.

A waitress stopped at our table, introduced herself as Holly, and took our drink order. In just a few minutes she was back with a bottle of water for Aly and a round of beers for the rest of us.

Christopher raised his bottle. “To Cash. Happy birthday, man.”

A chorus of happy birthdays went up and we raised our bottles. Glass clinked as we tapped the bottlenecks where they all met in the middle of the table. Aly shot me a knowing look when she stretched out to tap her plastic bottle against everyone’s beers.

Easy conversation struck up between all of us. Christopher and Cash led it, their voices boisterous and loud, while Aly and I laughed, adding to it, usually to call the two of them out on their bullshit. We ordered food, set into an easy pace, the five of us seeming to relax in the casual vibe.

With my girl tucked in close to my side, I took a swig of beer. Ice-cold liquid slid down my throat and settled in my stomach. All the tension that had been nagging at me had drifted away.

I felt good.

Really f**king good.

For once, I welcomed it, and for a few minutes, I refused to let guilt taint my joy.

I just wanted to enjoy my girl and the thought of us having a future. A real one. Not some f**ked-up existence where I was just wandering aimlessly through the days.