Pale Demon (The Hollows #9)(129)
Author: Kim Harrison

My gaze went to Bis, wishing he would wake up. He looked so sad up there, holding that bottle that had once held my soul. "I remember you singing my soul into that bottle," I said. "I don’t remember you being hurt."

A shudder lifted through him. "The sun went down. Al came." His eyes met mine, the green of them almost gray in the light. "He saw you brain-dead. He was…upset."

Guilt went through me. "Oh." Upset, hell, I’d be willing to bet he was furious and looking for someone to take it out on. Damn, Trent was lucky to be alive.

Trent leaned back, his hands going to cradle his knee as he crossed his legs. "I’d go as far as to say he was very upset," he said, looking at his hand. "It was my fault, naturally. I was the one who freed Ku’Sox. And because he couldn’t take me to the ever-after, he decided to take me apart and move me there bit by bit."

"My God," I whispered, seeing his missing fingers in a new way.

"Vivian tried to stop him-"

Worry pulled my heartbeat into a faster pace. "No…"

"She’s in intensive care," Trent said, and I eased back into the pillow, not relieved, but not as frightened. "She’ll be okay," he added, his eyes on the floor, undoubtedly reliving it.

"I’m sorry."

Trent wiped his face in an unusual show of agitation, and I remembered the feel of his bristles on me. "You were brain-dead. He never noticed the bottle. Bis took you, your soul, and hid it away. As far as Al knows, you are still dead."

He was looking at my sunburned arms and the band of charmed silver, and I saw it in a new way. Al thought I was dead? "You bested him," I said, and Trent gave a bark of laughter. It was a bitter, angry sound, and it struck through me cold.

"Bested him?" he said, uncrossing his legs. "We survived. And that was because of Pierce."

Again fear took me. Trent had said Al thought I was dead. Al was still alive. "Where is Pierce?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

Trent stood, turning to the window. I couldn’t read his tells. I was afraid to. "Pierce knew you were alive in the bottle," he said softly, the hospital noise coming in faintly. "He also knew that I was the only one who could get you safely out. If I died, you would die." Trent turned, his head bowed, looking nothing like himself in his wrinkled clothes and with his hair unstyled. "Pierce doesn’t like me much, but he took the blame. Said he was the one who caused your death by his failure to protect you and keep Ku’Sox from taking you into the lines. Al dropped me and took him instead."

My face lost its expression. Pierce had sacrificed himself. To save me.

Panicked, I sat up, swinging my feet to get out of bed and coming to a frustrated halt. Damn it, I had a catheter. "Where’s my mirror?" I asked, knowing he wouldn’t have it. I started pulling at the silver around my wrist again. "I have to talk to Al."

Trent’s face was empty of emotion when he turned back to me. "He did it because he loves you. I pity him."

"Al won’t kill him," I said frantically, not knowing if it was true. "He’ll be okay."

Shaking his head, Trent smiled sadly. "I don’t pity him because he’s a demon familiar. I pity him because he loves you."

I took a breath to say something but couldn’t exhale. Damn it, he’d sacrificed himself so that I would live. He knew I didn’t love him, and he’d done it anyway. "I-I…," I stammered, fingering the band of silver around my wrist. It was humming with wild magic, slumbering deep within it. I could feel it. I looked up at Trent, confused.

"Al saw you comatose," Trent said. "He told the demon collective. Perhaps you should keep it that way. This is why I gave you the charmed silver. It was a chance for me to…" He hesitated, sighing as he sat back down. His head was bowed over his knees, and his eyes were on his hands-his beautiful hands, now broken and marred. He might never be able to work some of the finer ley-line charms again, and I shivered.

"My father made you into a tool to save the elven race," he said softly, his voice pained. "It saved your life but took it from you at the same time by making you into something that most people would deem too dangerous to live." His head came up, and he met my gaze squarely. "I don’t know why, but I feel responsible. For everything. You weren’t given a choice, and I’m sorry for that."

"You didn’t do anything," I said, my mouth dry. "And your father saved my life."

"By twisting it to his own ends, without asking your permission." Trent exhaled. "I wanted to give you your choice back. That’s all."

I followed his gaze to the band of silver around my wrist. That’s all? That was everything.

"It’s not a normal zip strip," Trent said as he straightened up from his hunch over his knees. "It doesn’t simply cut off your contact to the lines but to the demon collective as well. Otherwise, they would know you were alive, even if you shunned the lines for the rest of your life."

My lips parted in understanding. If Al had seen me comatose and I was cut off from the collective, then I was as good as dead. Free?

"You can do earth magic still, and ley-line magic will work on you like any human, but demon magic won’t if it goes through the collective," Trent said, and I brought my wandering thoughts back to him.

"Curses won’t touch me," I said, and he nodded, his expression more earnest and open than I’d ever seen it. It was as if he was down to his bare essence, too tired and beaten to hide it.

"I didn’t do it to protect you. I did it because my father made you into something, and unless you choose to be that person, then you are nothing but a tool. You are not a tool, Rachel," he said earnestly, almost frighteningly. "You are a person. You can stay as you are and be, well, not normal, but as close as you can get to it seeing that the coven has denounced you as a day-walking demon. Or you can take the charmed silver off and be who you really are. It’s up to you. It’s your choice."

He was silent and still now, and I looked at the band, circling it around and around my red wrist. I was a day-walking demon who couldn’t do magic. But I could feel wild magic in me, simmering. Was it coming from the band of silver? Or had it been there all the time, and I only now noticed it, now that my contact with the ley lines was utterly and absolutely cut off?

"Isn’t that what you wanted?" Trent said, not understanding my silence. "A choice?"

I took a deep breath, pulling my gaze up as I gathered my thoughts.

"Yes. Yes it is," I said, and he smiled weakly. "Thank you."