Come to Me Softly (Closer to You #2)(64)
Author: A.L. Jackson

He stood up and twisted the cap from his bottle. “Ha, bringing home to-go boxes from the diner does not count as cooking.”

Shaking my head, I laughed. “Watch yourself or I’m going to make you eat the leftovers that have been sitting in the fridge for the last week.”

“Not on your life. I have dibs on firsts . . . whatever you’re making, my mouth is watering.”

Reluctantly, I turned from the lightheartedness of the rest of my family to my dad, who still hovered in the shadows outside. He shoved his hands deep in the pockets of his pants and rocked back on his heels. Agitation billowed from him in waves.

I stepped outside and closed the door behind me.

Never in the nearly two months that Jared and I had lived here had my father stepped foot inside our house. And I could count the number of words that had been spoken between us . . . on my right hand. A quiet hostility and an outright sadness had clouded all the moments we’d shared, which had been few and even farther between. I hadn’t seen him since Christmas morning. I’d gone for the shortest time, reluctant to leave Jared on the holiday but drawn to my parents’ home all the same.

I’d asked Jared just to forget what my father thought. To go. For me. But that request was good for only one redemption. He still felt he was honoring my father’s wishes by staying away, even as, at the same time, he was proving him wrong by taking care of me.

Going to my parents’ house without Jared had stung. He was my family. I’d gone only to save my mother from the hurt she would feel in my absence. She’d even attempted to convince Jared to come, but he wouldn’t have it.

Now I wasn’t exactly sure what had drawn my father to my door today. What had changed, if anything at all? Perhaps my mother had shamed him into being here. If so, then he could just go. I didn’t want him here out of obligation, and I sure as hell didn’t want him here because of guilt.

The only explanation good enough was that he truly wanted to be here.

Swallowing down all the anger I still felt, I took a tentative step deeper into the burly shadows of my father.

His eyes dropped. I thought to his feet. But no. I realized he was doing his best not to look at my stomach.

Resentment flared. It clashed with the truth of how much I missed my father. “Dad . . .” I choked saying it, not wanting it to sound like a plea. “Do you have any idea how happy it makes me you’re here? I’ve missed you so much.”

Moisture filled my eyes. I swiped it away and stood my ground. “But I need to know you’re here because you want to be . . . because you care about me and my family and you want to be a part of it. I don’t want you to come inside if you’re just here because Mom made you come or because of any other reason than you came here to support me and Jared.”

Dad rubbed his hand across his mouth. Disquiet shifted his feet. “How have you been feeling, Aly?”

I blinked, trying to make sense of his question. I frowned, and frustration poured from my mouth. “Are you really going to stand there and try to change the subject? After everything that’s been said? I asked you to tell me why you’re here and I want you to be honest with me.”

He exhaled heavily, and lifted his chin toward the door closed behind me. “I wasn’t joking when I said your mom chased me from bed when she was pregnant with you kids. She was miserable the whole time. God, I worried about her. For nine months, I ran around, trying to take care of her, making sure she was as comfortable as she could be. It made me sick that she was sick. Nervous, too. I was always worried something would go wrong, and I did anything I could to make sure that didn’t happen. I drove her crazy.” He paused, blinked toward his feet before he lifted his face back to mine. “I’ve always been protective of the people I care about. To a fault. To the extent that I can’t see past what I think is best for them.”

Understanding dawned. It blunted the surge of anger that had pushed me out my front door to confront my dad. Still, it didn’t make what he’d said before to Jared okay.

“I know you care about me, Dad. That you love me. But you also have to know that isn’t enough.”

His gaze glided down to the ring I nervously twisted around my finger. For a beat, he stared, and I saw his throat bob when he swallowed. “You’re going to marry him?”

I fisted my hand over my heart. “Yes.”

He nodded and his eyes glistened. He blinked it away. “You wanted to know why I’m here? I’m here because I miss you. Because when I lie down at night, I can’t close my eyes because I know things aren’t right. My daughter will barely talk to me . . . barely look at me. That kills me, Aly.”

“I’m not the one who’s responsible for that.”

His own frustration bled into his words. “I know that. Yes, I’m here because of you and because I want to set things right between us. But I’m also here because it’s high time I apologized for the way I reacted on Thanksgiving. I had no right to do that. There is no excuse for the things I said.”

Dismay twisted into his expression. “I was scared for you, Aly. Shocked. Blindsided by it all. One minute I think you’re going to school . . . happy . . . working toward the career you want, and the next you’re pregnant?” His voice dropped low and transformed into something that sounded like an accusation. “You gave me no warning, Aly, no indication of any of it.”

“The school thing . . . I’m sorry,” I said. “I should have told you a long time ago it wasn’t really what I wanted. I’ve always wanted to draw, and I thought it was impossible. But Jared showed me it wasn’t.” In one of my classes with a mentor, I’d been working on drawing families, working on photographs, images that captured emotion in time. That was exactly what I wanted, the direction I wanted to go, to pour myself into faces of families, making them come alive in an image that would become a family treasure. “But you know this isn’t really about what I want to do for a living, Dad. This is about me being with Jared.”

Looking down, he shifted. “And I’m not going to lie to you and tell you I’m not still scared for you, because I am. You’re my daughter. Of course all I want is the best for you. But I also accept how unfair I’ve been to Jared.”

He dipped his head, shook it in remorse. “He was always a good kid. Super smart, but kind, too. Then after what happened with his mom, a switch was flipped inside him. A destructive trigger there was no stopping. None of us could get through to him. Even though I cared about him, I was much more terrified he would lead Christopher down the same road. I was relieved when they sent him away. I kept a lot of guilt for a lot of years for feeling that way.”