Sun God Seeks…Surrogate? (Accidentally Yours #3)(24)
Author: Mimi Jean Pamfiloff

“I’m hanging up now. And then, I will spend every waking hour hunting your bony ass.”

“Hunting me? Maybe you should focus on your baby-mama, lover boy; I just spotted Penelope frolicking out and about alone. Not so smart when she’s on the Scabby dessert menu.”

“I do not believe you,” he said.

“Okay. I did not just see Penelope coming out of her apartment building toting two large duffel bags. I am not following her in my goddess-mobile.”

A horn honked in the background.

“Hold that thought, Sunshine.”

It sounded as though Cimil had dropped the phone. Next there was screaming in the background, “Shut your pieholes and go the f**k home!” Pause. “What? Did you give me the finger? I’ll rip it from your pasty little hand and stick it where the sun don’t shine!” More screaming in the background. “Oh yeah? You just try it, you little f**ker!” Cimil barked at someone.

“Gods dammit, Cimil!” Kinich yelled into the phone.

He heard Cimil grumble, tires screeching, and then clunking and static as Cimil picked up the phone.

“Fucking Cub Scouts,” she huffed. “Give them some mistletoe and a few Christmas carols and they think they own the whole f**king holiday!” Pause. “Okay, I am a good goddess. I am a kind goddess—oh hell. No I’m not. So! Where were we, Kin?”

Guy must have noticed the flames in Kinich’s eyes because he snatched the phone away.

“Cimil? What the devil is going on?” asked Guy. He listened and nodded. “I see. Yes. You know that you will eventually pay for your underhanded ways.” Pause. “No. I have not seen the video. Was it good?” Guy laughed. “Really? He did that? With the human and the midgets? Classic. Emma and I will be sure to watch it later.”

I will kill them both. Kinich lunged for the phone, but Guy stepped aside and then turned his broad back.

“Yes,” he said. “I will tell him. Deliver the girl.” He hung up the phone.

Kinich’s entire body smoldered. “You just f**ked with the wrong god.”

Guy shook his head and laughed. “Calm down, brother. Cimil is guarding your human. For a price, of course.”

“Which is?”

“Forgoing any revenge,” Guy said casually.

Gods f**king dammit!

“Did she say where Penelope is?”

Guy shook his head, “No, she merely said she’d drop her off at Niccolo’s later, but she had some cubs to mow down first. Sometimes her humor escapes me—why are baby bears loose in the city?”

Kinich resisted imploding from frustration. “I will go to Niccolo’s and wait for them.” Kinich turned toward the door.

“And, Kinich?” Guy added. “I will keep trying to contact my spy. If I am successful, I will inquire about your girlfr—human friend. But I suggest, in the meantime, you assume she is a Payal—and, therefore, wanted by the priests. Perhaps you should take her to your compound in Sedona.”

“Guy!” Emma screamed from the other room. “Get your sweet ass in here! My tongue and I are waiting!”

Kinich tried very hard not to think about his erotic dream with Penelope. Instead, he focused on his anger. He had plenty of that.

CHAPTER 14

Turned out, I’d had no reason to worry; someone, a neighbor perhaps, had locked the front door to my apartment. So after getting the spare key and the contact info for my mom from Mrs. Harris, I formulated my plan of attack. I would quickly go inside, grab my karate gear, cell, a change of clothes, and my purse.

Then I’d run like hell.

Later, after giving my class, I’d call one of my friends, Anne or Jess, and crash with them for a few nights or at least until I figured out what to do. Who knew if that monster might come back, which put a serious crimp in my living situation.

One pickle at a time, Pen. I pushed the front door open and stepped to the side, listening for any movement.

Nothing.

I slowly peaked through the doorway, shocked to learn that someone had tidied up. The apartment smelled clean and fresh, like exotic plants and sunshine.

Kinich.

Every ounce of anger and confusion inexplicably dissipated as my entire body felt lit up like a Christmas tree. A very, very naughty Christmas tree that wanted to do dirty, dirty things to a very sexy man’s candy cane; a man who most certainly wasn’t Santa.

A sex god, maybe. Even in my dreams he knew exactly where and how to touch me. Exactly like the Orgasm Whisperer I’d read about in Cosmo!

And to make Nick even more irresistible, he had gone and won a huge brownie point for cleaning up my place. To be clear, nothing was hotter than a hot man who enjoyed cleaning. Man-jackpot.

Yeah…but all the weird things he did and the way he treated you that night and—

No! I’m not thinking about this right now.

I dashed around the apartment, collecting clothes and toiletries, shoving them into a large overnight bag. I slipped my cell in my pocket. Yikes. Twenty missed calls from Anne and Jess. Nothing from my mother?

I was almost out the front door when I realized I’d forgotten something.

The stick!

I headed for the bathroom.

If I was pregnant, I’d…I’d…I didn’t know what I’d do. There was a nagging little tug on my heartstrings when I thought about Kinich. I barely knew the man, but I couldn’t ignore how he made me feel or how he affected me.

Yes, and how he accused you of being a sperm-napper! Wait. We’re not thinking about this. Remember?

Yesss. But it’s hard not to think about how he rescued me from that monster.

Okay, but he did say that…that thing didn’t actually want to kill you. So was it really a rescue? Maybe it was a misunderstanding. Maybe “it” wanted to borrow your shampoo and deodorant. The monster clearly had been deprived of badly needed personal hygiene products. I mean, that would make me angry, too.

“Oh no!” The stick wasn’t on the counter where I’d left it. Kinich must have found it when he’d come to clean up.

He knew! That turkey knew, and I didn’t?

My cell suddenly rang. Caller unknown. My mom maybe?

“Hello?”

“Damn you, woman! Where the hell are you?” Kinich’s voice roared through the speaker.

Wha…wha…“What!? Did you just call me ‘woman’ and bark at me like a child?”

“Yes,” he replied coldly. “And if you don’t want to find yourself dead, you’d better tell me where the hell you are!”