Medicine Man (Page 5)

He is super popular with the patients and the staff.

I remember thinking, how can you love your doctor? I mean, he’s a doctor. A psychiatrist, no less. Someone who prescribes you meds and arranges your life in a series of therapy sessions. But even I wouldn’t wish any harm on him.

Beth manages to calm people down with the help of techs and continues, “I know you guys are upset and I understand. Of course I do. I’m upset, too. Some of you have been very close to him, and I promise you he’s fine. I’ll let him know how much you guys love him. He’ll appreciate that.”

Smiling sadly, she takes in a deep breath. “But for now, I’m here to tell you that we’ve been very fortunate to have found a replacement for him. He’s due to arrive today and he’s an excellent doctor. I’m sure you guys will love him, and everybody will get along in this difficult time, okay?” She shoots a couple of pointed stares around the room. “If you have any questions, come find me or any of the staff members. We’re all here to help you.”

She’s ready to leave when Renn calls out, “Hey, Beth! Who’s the new guy? The one we’re supposed to love and get along with.”

Beth turns around and raises her eyebrows. “Right. Thank you, Renn, for shouting out that question. The doctor you’re supposed to love and get along with is Dr. Blackwood. Dr. Simon Blackwood. He’s coming to us from Boston. Mass General, to be specific. They have one of the most reputable psych departments in the country.” She throws a pointed stare again. “As I said, you’re in more than excellent hands.”

With that, she leaves, and noises recommence.

Renn murmurs, “Well, we already guessed the doctor part. Ugh. Is he age-appropriate for me to fantasize about or not?”

Penny spits back, “He’s a doctor. All talk about his looks is off-limits.”

They begin fighting but I tune them out. I’m frozen, trapped by the sound of a name.

Simon Blackwood.

Dr. Simon Blackwood.

He’s a doctor.

Actually, no. He’s an excellent doctor.

And he’s coming here.

Damn it.

The weather is miserable, and I love it.

It’s raining like it won’t rain ever again. The winds are battering against the window, shaking the whole hospital.

I hate that I love it so much. Because I can’t be outside and feel the sky fall on my body. I almost want it to take this stupid Victorian house apart, even though it’s a testament of a great love and all, so I can escape. We can all escape. I’m sure forty determined patients will be able to move a certain automatic gate up front.

We’ve been cooped up inside the entire day and it blows. Not to mention everyone is wary and shaken up about the new arrival.

Community group was really agitated today. This group is basically where they explain and re-explain the hospital rules and take in complaints from the residents. And today every complaint was against a man who managed to upset everyone, and he isn’t even here.

Sophie, a girl with severe insomnia, burst into tears, saying she came here to get better and not deal with this shit. If she wanted to deal with change, she would have stayed with her mom and her ever-changing boyfriends. Roger, the guy with homicidal ideation and Renn’s crush of the week last week, was worried about the vibe he’d get from the new doctor. He’s big on vibes and auras.

I’m usually quiet in such groups because my only complaint is that I don’t belong here. I’m sure it won’t go over too well with the therapist who handles the group. But then people started getting agitated when Renn expressed her own faux fears to rile things up: what if he does something to us in our sleep? I’d be so scared to fall asleep now.

I decided to intervene. “You guys, stop. He’s not that bad. I met him,” I said. “In the hallway. And you know, he looked pretty non-threatening to me. So yeah.”

Yes, I was lying but it was okay. It was for a good cause.

My lies are always for a greater purpose.

Renn threw me a suspicious look but whatever. At least I got everyone to calm down. For about two seconds, and then, the questions started.

Where did you see him? The nurses said he hadn’t arrived yet.

How’d he look?

What do you mean non-threatening? What’d he look like exactly?

How old is he?

The last one came from Renn.

I answered them the best I could: I met him when he was just arriving, five minutes before this meeting, and maybe that’s why no one knows he’s here yet. He looked pretty okay. Short and bald and yes, old.

Although I didn’t get a lot of time to embellish my lies, which I’m very good at by the way, because the therapist handling the group got us to shut up, with the help of a few techs.

All in all, this day sucks.

Now, I’m clutching Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban to my chest as I make my way toward the rec room at the end of the hall. Two nurses are standing in the corner, talking to each other, along with a couple of patients from my floor loitering about.

I pass by Beth’s office. Usually, all staff offices are located in the area that’s not freely accessible to the patients. But Beth told me when I first got here that she considers Heartstone a family and she wants to be available to everyone without having to jump through the hoops of appointments and whatnot.

Through her half-open door, I hear her talking to someone. But more importantly, I hear the same name I overheard a few hours earlier at breakfast.

Simon.

My feet come to a halt.

My eyes go wide.

“How’s he doing?” Beth asks to someone in her office. Someone who she called Simon a second ago. “I’m sorry I haven’t been in to see him this week. You know, with everything.”

There comes a rustling and that someone clears his throat. “He’s exactly the same as he was last week.”

Oh my God, is that Simon?

Is he here? Is he actually in there?

A long sigh. Then Beth says, “He likes to be difficult. I’ll give you that.”

“Well, he always liked you,” he says.

Simon says. No, Dr. Blackwood. Dr. Blackwood says. For some reason, I don’t want to be on a first-name basis with him. Even in my head.

Anyway, so Dr. Blackwood says. Or rather rumbles.

In a voice that’s deep and rough.

“And who can blame him.” Beth chuckles.

There’s a puff of air followed by a low grunt. I don’t think it should’ve made it out of the room for me to hear, but it did. That low, scratchy sound. Somehow, I know that it’s his laugh, rusty and unpracticed.

I swallow as my heart pounds more than it was already pounding.

There’s a prolonged silence. Seconds and minutes of silence. Or maybe it only feels like that to me. Because I’m frozen, unable to move. Then I remember that I’m standing in the middle of the hallway, trying to eavesdrop on a conversation. Twice in one day.

But how can I resist? He’s the new doctor, my new enemy. I have to listen.

I whirl on my feet and face the wall. I can’t be eavesdropping when there are people around. Or rather, I can’t make it obvious, so I try to make it look like I’m studying the collages on the wall.

It’s the photographs of the patients, hospital staff, previous doctors, therapists with their names written on colorful strips.

“I’ve said this before, but I’m glad you’re back. So glad, Simon. And I can’t tell you how excited I am that you’re here, at Heartstone. This is your place. You belong here.” Beth sounds nostalgic and so full of emotion.