Shades of Twilight (Page 33)

Pain flickered across Lucinda’s lined face.

"I’ve missed him every day that he’s been gone," she said softly.

"I’ll never forgive myself for what I let happen to him. I should have let folks know that I believed in him, trusted him, but instead I wallowed in my own grief and didn’t see what my neglect was doing to him. I don’t mind dying, but I can’t go easy until I make things right with Webb. If anyone can bring him back, Roanna, you can."

Roanna didn’t tell Lucinda that she had reached out to Webb at Jessie’s funeral, and been coldly rebuffed. Privately she thought that she had less chance of convincing Webb to come home than anyone else did, but that was something else she’d taught herself. if she couldn’t manage to block out her feelings, then her private pain and fears were just that, private. If she kept them inside, then no one but she knew they were there.

It didn’t matter what she felt; if Lucinda wanted Webb home, she would do what she could, no matter the cost to herself.

"Where is he?" "in some godforsaken little town in Arizona. I’ll give you the folder of information the investigator gathered for me. He’s … done well for himself. He owns a ranch, nothing on the scale of Davencourt, but it isn’t in Webb to fail."

"When do you want me to leave?"

"As soon as possible. We need him here. I need him. I want to make my peace with him before I die."

"I’ll try," Roanna said.

Lucinda looked at her granddaughter for a long moment, then a tired smile quirked her mouth.

"You’re the only one who doesn’t put on that fake cheerfulness and tell me I’ll five to be a hundred," she said, a hint of acerbic approval in her voice.

"Damn fools. Do they think I don’t know that I’m dying? I have cancer, and I’m too old to waste my time and money on treatment when old age is going to get me pretty soon anyway. I live in this body, for God’s sake. I can tell that it’s slowly shutting down."

There was no response that wouldn’t sound either falsely cheerful or callous, so Roanna made none. She was often silent, letting conversation flow around her, not thrusting out any verbal oars to deflect the tide her way. It was true that everyone else in the household tried their best to ignore the situation, as if it would go away if they didn’t acknowledge it. It wasn’t just Gloria and Harlan now; somehow, within a year of Jessie’s death and Webb’s departure, Gloria had managed to move more of her family into Davencourt. Their son, Baron, had decided to remain in Charlotte, but everyone else was there. Gloria’s daughter, Lanette, had moved in her entire family: husband Greg and children Corliss and Brock. Not that they were children; Brock was thirty, and Corliss was Roanna’s age. Lucinda had let the house fill, perhaps in an effort to banish the emptiness left by losing both Jessie and Webb. Assuming Roanna could convince Webb to re turn-a major assumption-she wondered what he would make of all this. True, they were all his cousins, but somehow she thought he might be rather impatient with them for taking advantage of Lucinda’s grief.

"You know that I changed my will after Webb left," Lucinda continued after a moment, taking another sip of tea. She gazed out the window at the profusion of peach colored roses, her favorite, and squared her shoulders as if bracing herself. "I made you the main heir; Davencourt and most of the money would go to you. I think it’s only fair to tell you that if you can convince Webb to come back, I’ll redo it in his favor."

Roanna. nodded. That wouldn’t make any difference to her efforts; nothing would. She would do her best to talk Webb into coming back but not let herself feel any personal loss when Lucinda changed her will. Roanna accepted that no matter how hard she tried, she simply didn’t have the knack for business that Lucinda and Webb possessed. She wasn’t a risk taker, and she couldn’t muster any enthusiasm for the game of big business. Davencourt would be better off with him in charge and so would the myriad financial investments and interests.

"That was the deal I made with him when he was fourteen," Lucinda continued, her voice abrupt and her shoulders still held stiffly erect.

"If he would work hard, study, and train himself to take care of Davencourt, it would all be his."

"I understand," Roanna murmured.

"Davencourt .. ." Lucinda stared out over the perfectly manicured lawn, the flower gardens, the pastures beyond where her beloved horses bent their sleek, muscular necks to

graze.

"Davencourt deserves to be in the best hands. It isn’t just a house, it’s a legacy. There aren’t many like it left, and I have to choose who I think will be the best caretaker for it."

"I’ll try to bring him back," Roanna promised, her face as still as a pond on a hot summer day, when no breeze existed to ripple the surface. It was the face she lived behind, a face of indifference, unreadable and serene. Nothing could pierce the safe cocoon she had woven for herself, except Webb, her only weakness. Despite herself, her thoughts drifted. To have him back … it would be heaven and hell combined. To be able to see him every day, listen to his voice, secretly hug his nearness to her in the long, dark nights when all her nightmares became real … that was the heaven. The hell was in knowing that he despised her now, that every look he gave her would be one of condemnation and disgust.

But, no, she had to be realistic. She wouldn’t be here. When Lucinda-she never thought of her as Grandmother anymore-died, Davencourt would no longer be her home. It would be Webb’s, and he wouldn’t want her here. She wouldn’t see him every day, perhaps not at all. She would have to move out, get a job, face the real world. Well, at least with her degree and experience, she should be able to get a decent job. Maybe not in the Shoals area; she might have to move, in which case it was certain she’d never see Webb. That, too, didn’t matter. His place was here. Her thoughtless actions had cost him his inheritance, so it was only right that she do what she could to return it to him.