Shades of Twilight (Page 62)

She had been stunned when he’d told her that he still needed her help. He silently thanked Lucinda for giving him the key to handling Roanna. The idea of anyone needing her got to her faster than anything else, and she couldn’t help responding to it. For a Split second he’d seen the wonder, the pure joy, that had lit the depths of her eyes, and then it had been so quickly hidden that if he hadn’t been deliberately watching her he wouldn’t have seen it at all.

He’d lied. He could handle everything without her help, If even with the added burden of his properties in Arizona. He thrived on pressure, his energy level seeming to increase with the demands made on his time. But she needed to feel needed, and he needed her to be close by.

He wanted her.

The phrase beat like a refrain through his mind, his veins, every cell of his body. Want. He hadn’t taken her in Nogales out of revenge or because of that damned bargain he’d made with her, or even to keep from hurting her feelings by pulling back after going that far. The simple fact was he’d taken her because he wanted her and was ruthless enough to use whatever means necessary to get her. The tequila was no excuse, though it had relaxed his control over his more uncivilized instincts.

He’d lain awake in his bed last night, thinking of her in the next room, wondering if she was awake, his damned imagination driving him crazy.

Knowing that he could have Roanna any time he wanted was more powerful than any chemical aphrodisiac ever discovered or invented. All he had to do was get out of bed and walk out onto the veranda, then slip through the French doors into her room. She had insomnia; she would be awake, watching him come toward her. He could simply get into bed with her and she would take him into her arms, her body, without question or hesitation.

Erotic dreams of that one kiss they’d shared so long ago had haunted his sleep for years. That had been bad enough, but the dreams had been only imagination. Now that he knew exactly how it felt to make love to her, now that reality had taken the place of imagination, the temptation was a constant, gnawing hunger that threatened to shred his self-control.

God, she’d been so sweet, so shy, and so damn tight he broke out in a sweat remembering how it had felt when he’d entered her. He had looked down at her as he made love to her and watched the expression on her face, watched the delicate pink of her nipples darken with arousal. Even though he’d hurt her, she had clung to him, arching her hips up to take him even deeper. It had been so easy to bring her to climax that he’d been enchanted, wanting to do it time and again so he could watch her face as she convulsed, feel her body flexing and throbbing around him.

The night had been exquisite torture, and he knew he would be fighting the same battle every night, with his frustration growing by the minute. He didn’t know how long he could endure it before his self-control broke, but for Roanna’s sake he had to try.

He’d been back at Davencourt a little over twenty-four hours, and he’d had a hard-on for what seemed like most of that time, certainly for the hours he’d spent in her company. If she’d seemed even the least inclined to flirt with him, in any way signal that she wanted him, too, he probably couldn’t have withstood the temptation. But Roanna Seemed totally unaware of him as a man, despite the hours they had spent in bed together. The idea was infuriating, but it seemed likely that she had indeed slept with him just to get him to come back to Davencourt.

Even that thought, instead of dampening his ardor, only intensified it. He wanted to toss her over his shoulder and carry her away for some hot, lazy sex on a sun-drenched bed, prove to her that she wanted him, that Davencourt and Lucinda had nothing to do with it. The fact was, where Roanna was concerned, his sexual instincts were so damn primitive he expected to start grunting and swinging clubs any minute now, And that was after only one day.

The grudge he’d held against her all those years was gone. Maybe it had been destroyed during the night they’d spent together, and he just hadn’t noticed it at the time. Habit was a powerful thing; You got so used to something that you expected it to be there even when it wasn’t. If any vestige had been left, she had demolished it the next morning with her quiet dignity and the utter defenselessness with which she had said, "All you had to do was snap your fingers, and I’d have come running," Not many women would have laid themselves on the line like that; none that he knew, in fact,

except for Roanna. He’d been staggered by the courage it had taken for her to say that, knowing what a weapon she had put in his hands if he’d been inclined to use it.

He wasn’t. He lifted his hand and snapped his fingers, watching the motion. Like that. He could have her just like that. He wanted her, God knows he wanted her so much he ached. But what he wanted more than anything, even more than he wanted to make love to her, was to see her smile again.

By the time she drove home late that afternoon, Roanna was aching with fatigue. She usually found organizational meetings deadly dull anyway, and this one had dragged on with hours of debate on insignificant details. As usual, she had sat quietly, though this time she had been concentrating more on holding her head upright and her eyes open than she had been on what people were saying.

By the time she turned south onto Highway 43, the sun and heat were almost more than she could fight. She blinked drowsily, glad that she was so close to home. It was almost time for supper, but she planned to lie down for a nap instead. She could eat whenever she chose, but sleep was a lot harder to achieve and far more precious.

She made a right turn off the highway onto a secondary road, and a mile or so after that she turned left onto Davencourt’s private road. If she hadn’t been so sleepy, she would have been driving faster, and she might have missed the blur of motion in her peripheral vision. She slowed even more, turning her head to see what had caught her attention.