Ethan (Alluring Indulgence #5)(64)
Author: Nicole Edwards

“How long have you known?”

“A long time,” Beau said honestly, surprised by his own admission.

“But you continued to engage in threesomes with me?”

“They were easier.”

“Than what?”

“Accepting what I suspected.”

“And that’s why you let me fuck you.”

It wasn’t a question, but it sounded as though Zane wanted confirmation. Beau flinched. He knew Zane had been uncomfortable at the time, but his best friend had moved out of his comfort zone for Beau’s sake. He knew he should be thankful, but he was shocked to the point he couldn’t form a coherent thought.

“If it’s any consolation, I think you’re good for E.”

Beau’s brow furrowed.

“I don’t know why he is the way he is, but… shit,” Zane paused. “I just want y’all to be happy. Whatever that means.”

“It’s not serious,” Beau said defensively.

“Horse shit,” Zane grumbled. “You don’t do casual sex, Beau.”

“What the hell are you talking about? I spent years fucking your girlfriends, Zane.”

“You did. But you weren’t in it for them, were you?”

Beau looked down at his lap. No, he wasn’t. He’d agreed to it so he could be closer to Zane. There had always been a curiosity that could never be sated. Not until V came into the picture. She’d read Beau like an open book.

“I’m sorry I did that to you,” Zane said, his voice full of remorse.

“You didn’t do anything to me,” Beau argued. “You didn’t force me. And I still enjoyed it.”

“But not like you do with Ethan?”

Nothing compared to what Beau felt when he was with Ethan. Not that he was going to tell Zane that.

“Do you love him?”

Beau was glad he hadn’t taken a drink because he would’ve probably choked to death. Drowned from inhaling beer.

“You don’t have to answer that,” Zane said, a curious smile on his face. “But do me a favor?”

“Sure. Anything.”

“Just… let me know if you need anything.” Zane was swinging the beer bottle in small circles between his legs as he stared downward. “I’ll always have your back. You know that.”

Beau swallowed hard, trying not to get emotional. These conversations with Zane were infrequent and rare. And truth be told, he had needed this. Needed to know that Zane supported him. That he understood. “I do know that.”

Zane looked up at him, and their gazes met across the room. Right there, in that moment, their friendship healed itself and Beau felt an enormous weight lift off of his shoulders. He wouldn’t admit it yet, but he was falling in love with Ethan. And he was grateful that his best friend would be there for him in the event his world came out from under him.

He prayed it never came to that.

Chapter Nineteen

Ethan had been at the shop for half an hour when Beau’s truck pulled in the drive. Glancing over at the clock on the wall, he realized it was only six o’clock. Shit. The sun wasn’t even up yet. The guy was an hour early. Figured. Ethan wouldn’t be able to lay into him for coming into work late.

Yes, his attitude had taken a drastic decline since Blake’s impromptu appearance and the argument they had after Beau’s ill-timed departure.

Ethan’s entire body hummed with the urge to fight. He wanted to blame it on Blake’s arrogance, but the fact that he’d asked Beau to stay and was rewarded with the sight of Beau driving away had left a gaping hole inside Ethan’s chest. He had actually opened himself up for the first time and look where it had gotten him.

No-fucking-where.

When Beau’s boots shuffled on the concrete, Ethan tried not to look up from what he was doing. Tried. Didn’t succeed.

“Mornin’,” Beau greeted, sounding as tired as Ethan felt.

“Coffee’s in the office,” he informed him, trying to pretend this was nothing more than business. If he could keep himself distanced from this man, he’d consider it a good day.

“Thanks.”

Obviously Beau wasn’t much in the talking mood at the butt-crack of dawn either, and Ethan should’ve been relieved.

He wasn’t.

He wanted to bombard Beau with words. Ask him why he left. Explain what had happened with Blake. Yell at him for walking away.

He didn’t do any of that.

Sipping his coffee, he fiddled with the engine beneath the open hood, not actually seeing anything in front of him.

For the last few hours, before he’d finally forced himself out of bed, he had tossed and turned, feeling completely and utterly alone for the first time in a long time. And it wasn’t like he didn’t spend every night by himself. But for some reason, after what happened between him and Beau the day before, the loneliness had taken on a heavier weight. He felt smothered by it.