Eyes Wide Open (The Blackstone Affair #3)(45)
Author: Raine Miller

Ethan pressed his hand to my back and led me outside. Soot bounced along ahead of us before jumping onto the brick base of an enormous garden urn flanking a secluded bench surrounded by deep purple larkspur and light blue lavender.

“This is so pretty, just like an English garden on a postcard.” I shrugged up at Ethan, who was looking really intense for a simple garden tour. He had his jaw set tight and a determined expression on his face. “Is it hard for you to see your dad with Marie?” I asked carefully.

He shook his head. “Not at all. Marie’s hot.” He grinned. “Go Dad, I say.”

“Well, that’s a relief. I was a little worried there for a moment. You seemed . . . tense during dinner.”

He pulled me down onto the garden bench and wrapped me in his arms, burying his head at my neck. “Do I seem tense now?” he muttered against my hair.

“Not as much,” I answered with a rub of my fingers at the base of his neck, “but your muscles here are very tight. When are we going to tell them? I thought we would have done it already.”

“We’ll make the announcement when we go back inside. I need a moment alone with you first.”

“I’ll take a moment alone with you.” I smiled into his handsome face looking so intently at me, the illumination from the garden lights reflecting in his blue eyes like tiny sparks. He leaned down to kiss me and swallowed me up with his expert technique. My stomach did a little flip at the sight of him looming, still just as affected by him now as I had been from the first moment we locked eyes that night in the Andersen Gallery back at the beginning of May.

Ethan kissed me in his father’s garden for far more than a moment, but I could have done it all night. His lips and tongue were magic from the beginning and still were. Ethan made me feel precious when he kissed me. No other man had ever made me feel so loved.

He pulled back finally and held my face in his hands. His thumb brushed over my lips in a caress that dragged over my bottom lip just enough to send the message. A “you’re mine” gesture that did strange things to my insides. The simplest touch from Ethan could do that, though, and I was familiar with the feeling by now. It just made me love him more, if that was even possible.

“I bought you something when we were at Hallborough. I found it in an antiques shop when I went into the village and knew it was for you. I’ve been waiting for the right moment to give it to you.” He pulled a small rectangular package out of his jacket pocket and placed it in my lap.

“Oh . . . I have a present?” I lifted the package and unwrapped the soft blue tissue. It was a book. A very old and very special book. My heart started thumping hard as I realized precisely what Ethan had given me. “Lamia, Isabella, The Eve of St. Agnes, and Other Poems by John Keats?” I choked out in complete shock.

“Do you like it?” Ethan’s expression was hesitant and I realized he might have struggled over this gift, unsure about whether or not I’d enjoy it. An early edition Keats had to cost a fortune, and this one was an early edition. Bound in green leather and still bearing faint gold embossed lettering on the spine, it was a work of art to me.

“Oh my god! Yes, you could say that, baby. This is a beautiful, magnificent gift. I’ll cherish it always.” I carefully opened the cover and held it up to one of the garden lamps to see. “There’s an inscription. ‘For my Marianne. Always, your Darius. June 1837.’ ” I brought a hand up to my neck and looked over at Ethan. “It was a lover’s gift. Darius loved Marianne, and gave her the book.”

“As I love you,” he said softly.

“Oh, Ethan. You’re going to make me cry again if you keep doing things like this.”

“Well, I don’t mind your tears, really. I never have. And especially when they’re not sad ones. You can cry happy anytime you want, baby.” He leaned down to touch his forehead to mine. “I adore the taste of your tears,” he said before pulling back.

I touched his cheek and whispered, “I love you too. And you give me far too expensive gifts.”

“Never, baby. I’d give you the world if I could. You never ask for anything. You’re so generous with yourself and you humble me with your spirit. I’m in awe of you most of the time. It’s true.” He nodded to emphasize his words. “I’m not lying.”

“Now it’s my turn to ask you if you’re real.”

His eyes roamed over me as he nodded again. “I think I became real when I met you.”

My heart dropped down to the cobblestones beneath my feet when Ethan got up from the bench and knelt in front of me. He took my hands in his.

“I know I’m a bit rough around the edges and I know I’ve trampled my way into your life, but I do love you with all my heart. Never doubt that. You’re my girl, and I want you and I need you with me forever. I would have wanted a future with you regardless. The baby coming is just more of a sign that this is right. We’re right, my beauty. We’re so right together.”

I couldn’t speak, but I agreed with him. We were so right together.

All I could do was look into his beautiful eyes and fall more in love with everything that was Ethan Blackstone. My amazing man.

The paths we take in life are never clear, and nobody can predict the future, but the night I laid eyes on Ethan, I knew there was something special about him. When I went to his flat that first time to be with him, I knew. I knew the decision would be life-changing too. For me it had been. He was everything I could have ever dreamed of in a partner, and even more about him that I never could have possibly imagined. Timing is always off. You deal with what comes, when it comes into your life.

Ethan was simply . . . the one for me. I squeezed his hands with mine. It was the only response I could give, considering my heart was beating so fast I felt sure I would float away if he wasn’t holding on to me.

“Brynne Elizabeth Bennett, will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me? Be my wife and the mother of our children.” He tilted his head and whispered the rest. “Make me real. Only you can do that, baby. Only you . . .”

“Yes.” I nodded fast.

I don’t know how I managed to even respond with that one little word. I heard myself speak it aloud, but all I could really do was look at him. Look down at him kneeling before me and feel the love he was pouring out back to me. There was so much more I could have said, but I didn’t. I wanted to just be in the moment and remember how I felt when Ethan asked me to make him real.