Vampires Need Not…Apply? (Accidentally Yours #4)(13)
Author: Mimi Jean Pamfiloff

Why, oh, gods, why?

Worse of all, seeing the man callously revived those dormant feelings she’d thought dead. Useless feelings. Gritty, raw, needy feelings.

Ixtab’s overloaded mind replayed taunting images of Antonio. Yes, that man was pure sex. Not that Ixtab had ever had sex. Or ever would. Even with black jade—a fairly new discovery that blunted a deity’s energy and allowed him or her intimacy with humans—at her disposal, that sort of physical contact was simply not in the cards. Not for her, anyway. The dark energy channeled through her touch was simply too potent. Didn’t stop her from wanting, though. This man, with his deep olive skin and strong lips, was built like a champion stallion. Had he known his robe was open at the bottom?

Ixtab sighed.

With such an enormous distraction, how had she even performed the cleansing ritual and managed to keep her cells polarized in the right direction?

“Are you all right, ma’am?” A young nurse reached for Ixtab to aid her, but Ixtab scrambled away and then sprang to her feet.

“Don’t touch me. I’m fine.” She scurried down the hall into the stairwell. She needed to get the hell out of there and off-load quickly. Antonio’s darkness and self-loathing swirled in her head. What had the man done to hate himself so profusely? Not even she disliked herself that much, and she’d done some pretty outrageously heinous things worthy of hatred—on accident, of course. Always on accident.

Gods, I can’t think straight. She needed to shed this physicist’s energy fast. It felt like it had wrapped itself around her heart in a stranglehold. She’d never experienced such an alarmingly intense sensation.

Ixtab bolted outside to the pedestrian-filled street, careful to steer clear of any humans, and headed for the subway. There was always someone worthy of a little death on the subway.

Yes, all she needed was to cleanse and everything would be fine. Wouldn’t it?

Chapter Siete

Five deserving victims later, Ixtab returned to Helena and Niccolo’s building. It was quite a nice place actually. The communal areas, including the lobby, were decorated with modern furniture, mostly reds and whites, with a few richly upholstered, overstuffed chairs and velvety pillows. Kind of an Alice in Wonderland meets Target look. Of course, Helena was bunkered down with her man-nanny and daughter at Kinich’s, so she’d offered up the unoccupied penthouse, which Niccolo had decorated in classic vampire chic (top-of-the-line, spare-no-expense, modern everything).

But first, a stop. Ixtab got off the elevator on the nineteenth floor and knocked on the first door. Ironically, the physicist’s apartment was only one door down. What would Dr. Acero think if he knew his neighbor was a vampire?

“Go the f**k away!”

A very cranky vampire. Ixtab rolled her eyes and pushed open the door. “Sure. I’d love to come in.”

Though dusk had already made its appearance, Kinich’s blinds remained drawn and he sat in the darkest corner of the living room, staring at a wall.

It pained her to see her favorite brother like this. He truly had been dealt a nasty hand.

“Hi. I’m looking for Kinich. He’s about, yeah, so tall. Master of all things sunny. Thinks he’s king of the Universe. Recently turned undead. Have you seen him?”

Kinich didn’t budge.

“Okay. I’m not getting the funny bone award, but cut me some slack; I’m the Goddess of Suicide.” She reached into her bag and popped an orange Tic Tac into her mouth. She still tasted that damned physicist on her tongue. She’d have to cleanse again later and see if she could dispel the lingering residue.

“Go the f**k away,” Kinich grumbled.

Ixtab flipped on the lights and cringed. This is seriously depressing. Black-and-white prints of necks hung on gray walls, and most of the furniture was black.

She took a seat on the black leather couch and continued to inspect the room. Yes, clearly Helena had furnished the apartment expecting the usual vampire tenant. She’d bet her favorite red flip-flops that the bedroom had a four-post bed with black bed curtains and red satin sheets.

She leaned forward and glanced through the doorway leading to the bedroom.

Yup. Kind of a surprise, too, because Helena and Niccolo—a vampire and ex-vampire—had excellent taste in furnishings for their private homes. But this? She made a sour face. Icky.

Ooh! New reason! Vampires are icky, number four: their homes look like an after-hours strip club minus the pole.

To be clear, the pole would be an improvement—liven up the place a little.

“Are you still here? I said get the f**k out!” Kinich screamed.

And while she was adding to her icky list, she should also note that vampires were in a constant state of irritability. So. Annoying. She’d yet to meet a male vampire who didn’t trigger an urge in her to kick him in the man taters. Exception being Kinich, of course. Poor guy. He lived for sunshine. And now he was anti-sunshine.

Mr. Cloud?

“Kinich, I know things are rough, but Penelope needs you. She calls every day, crying and asking to come see you—”

His head snapped up. Those eyes, which were usually a stunning turquoise like hers, turned coal-mine black. “I tried to kill her. Fucking kill her, Ixtab! What she needs is nothing to do with me.”

She wanted to reach out and provide comfort, but she’d yet to ever touch a vampire. Who knew what might happen? Probably not the best time to find out.

“You’re still adjusting,” she argued. “Give it time—”

“I’ve had sixty-five! Sixty-fucking-five bags of f**king blood and can think of nothing but drinking her! She’s carrying my baby, for f**k sake.”

“Jeez. I wasn’t aware vampires were so into naughty words.” Reminds me of the physicist actually. “I love naughty words by the way, but only when used sparingly and in witty, creative context. So can I buy a non-f-word, please, Alex? I’ll take Tormented Vampires and Their Stranded Pregnant Mortals for two hundred dollars.”

Kinich didn’t laugh.

Dammit. She was only trying to make him feel better.

“Okay. I need to work on my jokes,” she said. “I feel like that damned android from Star Trek—Info? Or… Megabit?” She scratched her temple. What was his name?Well, I guess I know what I’m doing tonight: reruns!

“Seriously, Kinich, you’re going to have to find a way to get over this—whatever the hell it is—and go to her. Otherwise, you’ll lose her.”