Avoiding Responsibility (Avoiding #2)(70)
Author: K.A. Linde

"It could have been a good thing if you had been honest with me," she told him. "Instead you chose to lie to me. You chose to deceive me. I have nothing left that’s mine. Your lies have permeated everything that is important to me. I don’t know if I can talk to you anymore Ramsey until you find the truth," she said walking towards the door.

He quickly ran after her. "The truth is I want to be with you. I went about it wrong, but it doesn’t change how I feel," he said grabbing her elbow to stop her. She yanked her arm back pulling her shoulder too forcefully and sending a wrenching pain through it. "I know I made some mistakes, but they are minor Lexi. We can work through them. Please give me the chance to work through them."

"How can I when I can’t even look at you without seeing the lies all over you?" she asked taking another step backwards. "These lies were for you not for me. You lied to cover your past and your wealth and your importance. I just wanted you as you are. You wouldn’t even give me that. Who are you?" she whispered.

"I’m yours," he said following her down the barren hallway. "I’m all yours."

"You can’t be mine," she said shaking her head. "Someone who belongs to me is able to give themselves over to me. I gave myself to you and all you did was abuse my trust."

"Please let me try to fix this," he begged seeing her slipping through his fingers.

"You can’t. I think this is it Ramsey. I can’t date someone for a year and then find out I never knew who he was," she said weakly hating even saying the statement. She knew it was true but her heart was breaking at the thought of being without him.

"I can. I can fix this Lexi. You know who I am. I swear you do."

"Good bye Ramsey," she said standing on her tip toes and kissing him softly on the mouth. He pulled her tight against him trying to deepen the kiss, trying to remind her of what he could give her. She pressed her hand against his cheek and broke away from his lips. "Please don’t call me," she added breaking away from him, rushing out the back door, and into her car.

She revved the engine and peeled out of the parking lot. The weight of what had just happened settled over her and she found that she didn’t even have tears to cry for what she had just done. She cared for Ramsey more than she had ever thought, but now all she could see was the tangle of lies surrounding him. She couldn’t help but wonder how different he actually was from Bekah. Perhaps this deception ran in the family. That thought alone held her tears back.

She was driven by one thought: she needed to get back to New York. She needed out of this god forsaken town and out of this oppressive heat. She needed to get away from the smog of the commuter city and back to her home with its own smells and intricacies. As swiftly as she could she piled the majority of her belongings into her two largest suitcases and departed for Hartsfield-Jackson Airport. She purchased the next plane ticket out of town not even bothering to cringe at the expensive fare.

As she sat down in the terminal awaiting her flight, she wondered who she should call to have her pick her up. Suddenly she realized she would be even more alone in New York with her roommate, Rachelle, working out of town and Chyna in Milan at her photo shoot. Lexi cursed out loud, much to the chagrin of an old married couple and a teenage mom toting around four obnoxious children, when she realized that they were about to board and she had no one to pick her up when she arrived in town.

Nodding to herself she realized, in fact, she did have one person and quickly jotted out a text message briefly explaining the situation and asking if she could be picked up in a couple hours. Surprisingly she got an almost immediate reply.

"Good to hear from you. Sorry about the circumstances. I’ll be there when you land. –Adam."

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K.A. Linde

Epic Baggage

Come on and we’ll try, one last time

I’m off the floor one more time to find you

And here we go there’s nothing left to choose

And here we go there’s nothing left to lose

-Mat Kearney "Nothing Left To Lose"

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Chapter 23: Present

Lexi rolled over letting her arm stretch languidly over her head. She kept her eyes closed savoring the last few seconds of grogginess before she had to get out of bed. She smiled as she sank back further into the soft down pillow under her head and stretched her body out under the comforter. Her hands brushed up against the hard wood headboard, and she blushed thinking about how she had used the headboard last night.

"What’s that devilish grin for?" Ramsey asked leaning forward and kissing both of her red cheeks.

Lexi giggled letting her eyes open to look at the man lying next to her. "Nothing," she cooed looking at his bright green eyes from under her thick black lashes.

"You don’t blush without reason," he said sliding his hand across her bare stomach and pulling her closer to him.

"I think I blushed all last night," she murmured pushing her hands up against his chest.

"I’d say you had a reason for that."

Lexi giggled and snuggled closer to him. "True."

"And anyway I don’t think I gave you an opportunity to think about blushing. You were too preoccupied," he said as he ducked down to give her a heated kiss.

"I think you might be right," she agreed tilting her head to allow for easier access.

Lexi wrapped her arms up around his neck pressing herself flat against him. She knew she was egging him on, but she couldn’t help it. Everything had been so perfect last night after they had talked things out. It was like Parker had never existed in their relationship. She had missed that feeling so much. All she wanted to do was stay in bed all day and forget the past month had happened. That would truly be an ideal situation.

"Woah there," he said pulling back briefly, "do you think you’re ready again…already?"

Lexi shrugged before lifting her head off the pillow to kiss him again. "Yes." It was his turn to grin devilishly as he moved his hand down between her legs. She groaned enjoying his gentle prodding, but also feeling some major after effects of last night’s…activities. "Wait…maybe not."

Ramsey chuckled and shook his head at her. "I had a feeling," he said stilling his hand and giving her another playful kiss. "How about a shower?" he offered.

"Ugh," Lexi groaned shaking her head side-to-side. "I can’t move a muscle."

Ramsey clearly seemed to be enjoying the effect he had had on her. He tried to cover a second chuckle, but couldn’t seem to manage it.

"Hey," she said swatting him on the arm, "this is all your doing."

He grabbed her hand and laced his fingers with hers. "And I am so glad that I made you so sore you can’t even get out of bed. How about some breakfast in bed?" he asked as his thumb rubbed circles into her hand. "I could go fix something and let you sleep for a little longer."

"Oh! I like that idea," she said closing her eyes and wrapping both of her arms around him. She held him in place for a short while as she pretended to instantly fall into a deep slumber. She wanted the best of both worlds: breakfast in bed and Ramsey in bed. Well she favored the later more than the former.

Ramsey shook his head at her as he attempted to disentangle himself from her. He didn’t particularly want to leave, but if she kept this up he didn’t care how sore she was, he was going to take her right then and there. He could already feel himself hardening as she pressed her full br**sts against him.

"I can’t make you breakfast while I’m still in bed with you," he moaned trying to unhook her arms from around his neck. There was nowhere else he wanted to be in that moment than lying in bed with Lexi especially after the night they had just had and the gorgeous look on her face that morning.

"But I don’t want you to leave," she told him, holding him tighter.

"I’ll make you coffee," he murmured into her ear.

"Coffee?" she asked perking up.

"Of course. Just the way you like it."

"Alright. Alright," she grumbled slowly releasing him. She would do anything for a good cup of coffee in the morning.

She smiled brightly as she watched him climb out of bed and into a pair of blue boxers. She could clearly see what effect she had on him through the thin material, and was thankful that Brad and Jason had moved out. She understood more and more how much Ramsey had been working to make a better life for her, and in that moment she was appreciative of the changes.

Ramsey exited the room with a glance back in her direction. She sighed pleasantly and stretched out in the bed again. What a wonderful morning! She couldn’t remember the last time she had been this happy…well she could. There had been that blip on her radar where she had been with someone else and things had kind of felt right. She couldn’t even think about that right now. She hadn’t been in the right state of mind in that situation.

All she had been able to think about for the past month was how Ramsey had lied to her. She hadn’t thought that they had a shot in hell of getting back together. Of course she missed him terribly. They had been together for a year and it’s not like they had broken up because she wasn’t interested anymore. She was definitely still interested, if last night was any indication of that. And she knew that she had to tell Ramsey about what had happened especially now that they were back together. They hadn’t been together when it had happened, but the longer she held it in the more it would look like she was hiding it from him. The last thing she wanted to do was put herself in the same situation as Ramsey. They wouldn’t have broken up at all if he had just been honest about what had happened with Parker…among other things. She just needed to be honest about what she had done in New York.

But the thought of breaking free of the bliss that she was currently in with him made her cringe. They were so happy right now. But with Adam coming into town later today, she knew that she had to break the news sometime soon. She didn’t want him, or Chyna for that matter, to find out from someone else.

Lexi pushed her hands back through her hair and let her eyes fall back closed. This was going to be more difficult than she thought. After all the years of deception with Jack, her stomach knotted up immediately at the thought of telling Ramsey this one thing. He would forgive her. She was sure of it. She just couldn’t keep herself from freaking out about it. It was an occupational hazard from years of lying.

Lexi bolted upright in bed at that thought. Speaking of years of lying, today was the day. She couldn’t believe that it was here. This whole week…this whole year had been leading up to this very moment. As much as she had tried to avoid today from happening, life had caught up with her.

Jack was going to get married today.

Her stomach rolled even more at the thought. Today was the big day. She had managed to get through a bachelor party, afternoon brunch, bachelorette party, and a rehearsal dinner with only a few minor mishaps, but today was going to be much harder than that. Jack would officially be off the market after today.