Avoiding Responsibility (Avoiding #2)(75)
Author: K.A. Linde

"I just mean that when I saw you with Ramsey, I saw that I wasn’t everything to you," he murmured leaning against a dresser for support. "I saw that we had too much baggage to really work together as a couple. I wanted it. I always wanted it, but I just wasn’t sure if it was ever plausible. I wasn’t sure if you could ever look past what had happened in our past to move onto a future with us."

"So you picked the easy way out. You f**ked me and then went for your blonde bitch as always," she snapped forcefully. Lexi was so angry at his explanation. She had had similar thoughts at one point in time, but that didn’t mean she was just going to walk away from him. She had ran away so many times before so it should have made sense that Jack had done the same thing. They were two peas in a pod. But to just desert their entire past because he was scared and jealous was just a terrible explanation. She would have expected better from Jack. Even though she didn’t know why she should have that expectation. He had always fallen short of them before. "You didn’t even have the decency to…oh I don’t know…communicate with me about any of this. I didn’t even know you were planning to propose and then poof you’re engaged."

"I was going to tell you," he said reaching out to her.

Lexi instantly took a step away from him. She couldn’t believe him. She couldn’t believe anything he said to her anymore. He had lied to her…about everything. And it was about damn time that she followed through with that belief. No more giving in to him just because that was what she had always done. She liked to think she had grown since then…even in a week’s time. "No. No you weren’t, and it doesn’t matter. You were right about Ramsey anyway. That’s probably why we’re back together."

"What?" Jack asked his head snapping to face her. He groaned at the sudden movement and leaned more heavily on the dresser. "You guys are back together."

Lexi looked at him suspiciously. He looked a bit shaken by the announcement though to be fair she had just kicked him in the balls. He probably would look shaken regardless. "Yes stop acting so surprised."

"He is not right for you," Jack said instantly.

"Oh please," Lexi said rolling her eyes. "As if Bekah is good for you? I don’t think so."

"This isn’t about Bekah. This is about Ramsey."

"This is just as much about Bekah as it is about Ramsey. You have no say in whether or not I’m dating him or why," Lexi snapped. She was tired of his games. She was tired of him wanting her to be single while he went off and married Bekah. That didn’t make sense. Bekah and Ramsey were intrinsically linked in this charade that her and Jack had been playing.

She could see it in his face that he didn’t want to concede that point. He never wanted to give up his hold on her. It didn’t matter if he was going to be married in a few hours. These things didn’t generally cross Jack’s mind. "I know you’re dating him, because you think he can give you a happy life."

"I don’t just think that Jack. I know he can," she said with a cocky smile.

"What you think everything is just going to be fine now that he’s working with Parker every day?" Jack asked taking a few steps back from the dresser and resting against the footboard of the enormous bed centered in the room. Lexi knew she had entered a bedroom when she had walked in, but until that second she hadn’t really assessed her surroundings. The bed really was massive. It took up a significant portion of the room and was so full of down pillows and a soft down comforter that when Jack leaned back the bed dipped in around him. It looked like it would completely envelope her if she lay back against it.

Lexi didn’t want to think about Parker, but she knew that she couldn’t back down from Jack. Once he knew he had an advantage he would just keep pushing until he got his way, and she couldn’t have that. Ramsey was not interested in Parker. They had history and nothing else…just like she wanted things to be like with Jack. If Ramsey had wanted to get back together with Parker, he had had years to do that. There was no need now when he was finally happy with Lexi to go and mess things up with Parker. The only reason Lexi was even here was because Ramsey had asked her. He had trusted her enough to not give into Jack, and she had to trust him in turn.

"Yes, I think everything will be fine," she said standing her ground.

Jack laughed. He actually laughed at her. It sounded rather painful since he was still recovering, but it was definitely laughter. "When people have that much history, it’s never fine. Just look at us…look at where we are. You think this is just fine?"

"I think I just kicked you in your balls to show you just how fine everything is between us," she said leveling her gaze on him.

"Yes, but they were going to get married. It’s a bit different don’t you think?" he asked trying to unseat her.

"You want to bring up people getting married Jack?" she asked glaring at him.

Jack shrugged again unperturbed by her bringing up his wedding again. "Go on and tell me that you think it’s the same as us," he challenged her.

"You know, in fact, I don’t think it’s the same as us. If they wanted to be together, they would have. Clearly they don’t want that. They might be working together, but that’s all Jack. Not everyone is like you. You have no idea what Ramsey can give me," she said shoving a lock of hair behind her ear.

Jack shook his head side to side. He hadn’t missed her nervous tick at the end of that last statement. "Just as delusional as you always were," he said resting his arm back against the bed invitingly.

"And what’s that supposed to mean?" she asked avoiding looking at the bed. The last thing she wanted to do was appear interested in that bed.

"On some small level you don’t think that working in close proximity together every day is going to rekindle something that was once there? Imagine if we had to work together every day. What would it be like?" Lexi stopped and considered it. She was sure that it would be a disaster. She had trouble enough resisting him when she rarely ever saw him. She couldn’t imagine what it would be like. But she didn’t know if that’s how Ramsey and Parker’s relationship worked. It was unfair to judge them based on how an atypical relationship functioned. "I take it you get my point?"

"I think it’s different with them than it is with us, because they were together, they broke up, and they moved on. We were never together, we never broke up, and we’ve never moved on. Clearly you just kissed me."

"But it’s not that far-fetched," Jack countered.

"Stop trying to make me doubt what I have Jack. It’s not going to work. Ramsey and I have so much more than you ever gave me. You don’t even know what it’s like to be in a relationship with me. Ramsey does. You don’t know what it’s like to vacation with me. Ramsey does. You don’t know what it’s like to not be scared that we’re going to cheat on each other. Ramsey knows that feeling. In some ways he knows me better than you ever could Jack, because you never gave us a real shot. I’m not going to stand here and let you talk shit about Ramsey. I love him and that’s that," she said turning away from him angrily.

She knew that she hadn’t exactly done what she had been planning to do when she walked into Jack’s room, but he had changed the game when he had kissed her. She didn’t care if he married the bitch or not. She didn’t care whether or not he ruined his life. She just wanted him out of hers.

Lexi reached for the door knob, but Jack stopped her. "Okay Lexi, you win."

She wasn’t sure if she had ever heard those words from his mouth. Somehow throughout their entire relationship, Lexi had always felt like she was on the losing side of the scenario. Jack never gave in. Jack never backed down. Jack never relented.

"What did you say?" she asked slowly turning back around.

"You win," he repeated admitting defeat.

Lexi gulped. "What do I win?" she asked hesitantly.

"I didn’t give you what you deserved. I screwed you over like a royal ass when I really just wanted to make everything better," he said edging towards her.

"Jack," she murmured eyeing his approach with caution. She didn’t want this apology…or whatever it was to get out of hand.

"I’ve never treated you the way I should have. I would do anything I could to go back to that time when we could have been together and change the way I acted. But…"

"But you can’t," she finished for him easily. She hardened her gaze and crossed her arms barring him from intruding in her space.

"No…I can’t," he said nodding his head sadly. "So what should I do Lex?" he asked his bright blue eyes searching hers.

Lexi sighed and shrugged her shoulders. What could she tell him? She was here to tell him to get married to give up on her, and wasn’t that exactly what she had just argued for? Yet, a small part of her still didn’t want him to get married. An even larger part just didn’t want him to marry Bekah. She was torn. Could she truly tell him to marry someone she thought was completely wrong for him? Was it better to just allow him to be completely and totally off the market even if she was sending him to his grave? She hated thinking like that, but it kind of felt like that.

"I can’t tell you what to do Jack," she murmured dropping her arms. "You have to decide on your own."

"I know I should, but what should I do?" he asked begging her for an answer.

"Look, the fact that you are debating this at all should be a sign," finally muttered.

Jack nodded pleading with her to continue. "So you think I should call it off?"

"I am not going to be responsible for you calling off your wedding!" she cried. "You make up your own f**king mind Jack Howard!"

"Don’t start yelling at me. You know how I feel about you when you get angry," he said taking another step towards her.

"Do you want to have another injury?" she asked him arching an eyebrow.

"Uh no," he said stepping backwards again. "I just don’t know what to do Lex."

"Do whatever you want. I was supposed to come in here to convince you to marry her. Well let’s be honest I came here a year ago and was pretty successful at it. Why should now be any different?"

Jack stopped and really looked at her. Lexi wasn’t sure why that statement had managed to keep him from advancing on her, but she wasn’t going to complain. If she had finally gotten through to him then all the better.

"Alright," he said nodding. "Thanks for coming to see me even though you didn’t want to. It really means a lot…everything to me Lex."

Lexi tried to keep her mouth from dropping open. Who was this person? Jack never gave up. Jack never apologized. He certainly never thanked her for her opinion on the matter. They could work together in the easy way that their relationship had formed over time, but this was different. This made it seem like Jack had somehow grown too since she had last seen him, which seemed hella implausible considering he had just kissed her.

"You’re welcome Jack," she said taking that opportunity to push the bedroom door back open.

Lexi turned around to face the questioning looks of the groomsmen and found herself face to face with an entire room of people she had not been anticipating.

"I knew it!" Bekah screeched sauntering forward. Her hair and makeup were immaculate, but she had yet to be fitted into her wedding dress for the upcoming event.