Professor Feelgood (Page 55)

“Jacob! Can we have a picture with you and your girlfriend? Bring her over.”

I get ready to tell them I’m not his girlfriend when Jake says, “Get over here.” He takes my hand and draws me into his side. “Sid specifically said he wanted pictures with both of us, so pretend I’m one of the guys from your romance novels rather than a monster and smile.” He winds his arm around my waist, and the warmth of his hand gives me goosebumps.

Contrary to his earlier statement, Jake stares at each photographer as if he’d like to murder them. Luckily, intense and pissed-off works for him, and I don’t miss the cavalcade of approving looks he gets from passers-by.

Finally, when my cheeks are starting to ache, a staff member leads us to the huge double doors of the ballroom.

As we step inside, we gape at the room in awe.

“Damn,” Jake says, taking it all in.

The room is teeming with activity, and everywhere I look, there’s something new and fabulous. Up in the ceiling, a dozen performers dangle from long lengths of silk; around the outside of the room is a digital archery range emblazoned with neon cupids, and at the front is a huge stage with an orchestra and a dance floor. All in all, it’s like a mixture between a high-tech carnival, a dinner club, the bat cave, and Cirque du Soleil.

“Unbelievable,” Jake says.

I look over at him, and for once it’s easy to see the boy he used to be within the framework of the man he is now. One time they were having fireworks in a park near our neighborhood, and Jake and I crawled out onto my porch roof to watch them. It was the first time either of us had seen fireworks, and the expression on his face back then mirrors how he looks now.

When he notices me staring, he frowns. “What?”

“Nothing. It’s just …”

He turns to me. “Just, what?”

Every now and then I get a flash of my childhood best friend, and it leaves me with a pang of longing so severe, it takes my breath away.

“Nothing. Never mind.”

He stares for a second then shakes his head and turns away. “So, who the hell are all these people?”

“Romance Central clients. A bunch of New York singles. People looking for love.”

“And they think an app is going to help them find it?”

“They’ve probably tried everything else. What do they have to lose?”

“Everything.”

My attention is drawn to a tall man in front of us who looks familiar. When he turns, I’m shocked to see that it’s Toby. I’m used to seeing his face framed by his long, shaggy hair and messy stubble, and I’ve never seen him in anything but skinny jeans and cardigans. But sometime between when I saw him this afternoon and now, he’s had a haircut, and his face is freshly shaven. Not only that, he’s tugging at the collar of a very slick dinner suit.

Objectively, he’s a total babe.

“Toby! Hey.”

He sees me and smiles. “Hey, Ash! You look incredible, as usual.”

“You, too. Did you have a makeover?”

He glances down at himself. “Uh, yeah. A friend said I needed to be more sophisticated for tonight.” He gestures to the suit. “Hence this monstrosity. I have a hunch this collar is trying to kill me, but what do I know?”

He glances at Jake. “Hi, I’m Toby Jenner. You must be Phillipe. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Jake takes his hand. “Nice to meet you, but I’m not the boyfriend.” He doesn’t say ‘thank God’, but it’s implied in his tone.

“This is Jake Stone, Tobes,” I say. “We’re working together on a book.”

Toby looks relieved for a second before recognition sparks. “Wait, you’re that Professor Feelgood guy, right? There’s a whole bunch of girls at work who are obsessed with you.”

Jake smiles, but it seems forced. “Uh … tell them hi from me.”

“This HEA app is Toby’s brainchild,” I tell Jake. “He’s a genius.”

Toby shakes his head. “Not really, but thanks anyway. I just hope it helps bring people together. That’s what life’s all about, right? Finding meaningful connections.” He beckons us to follow him. “Come on over and I’ll get you guys set up.” He leads us over to a bank of screens, and after he guides us through setting up the app on our phones, he points to a graph.

“So, the whole thing is based on a new type of algorithm I’ve developed that you can use to test different types of compatibility.” He swipes the image. “The first step is to complete the questionnaire, but this is the real game changer.” He holds up what looks like clear plastic stickers with a pattern of silver foil inside them. He peels off the stickers and places them on the backs of our phones. “Any app can create a probable match based on random variables. That’s easy. But what they can’t account for is chemistry. No one really knows why we’re attracted to certain people. But with this bio film in your palm, the app will read your biological and electrochemical reactions to someone and add that into the compatibility equations.”

He hands our phones back then gets out his own. “So to demonstrate, Ash, open your app.” When it’s open, he taps some settings into both phones. “And now, we just stand close together.” He moves forward until we’re almost touching. “Just keep breathing. It will take about thirty seconds.”

I stare at Toby’s chest and wait for the bio reader to do its work. It feels strange being this close to him. Not unpleasant, but also not comfortable.

“The app is reading the changes in our heart rate, breathing patterns, blood pressure, pheromone production, etcetera, and then …” Both our phones ping at the same time.

Toby reads his screen. “Okay, so, this will come as no surprise, but I’m extremely attracted to you, and …” He looks at my phone. “You’re … not extremely attracted to me.”

I glance at the blue circle that’s flashing ‘62/100’.

Toby shrugs. “To be honest, that’s better than I was expecting.”

I give him a smile. “Well, you do look extra fine tonight.”

I think I see a hint of a blush as he points to another feature on the screen. “When you add your attraction score to the results of your questionnaire, you get your overall compatibility, and then, shazam. You’re on the road to finding your soul mate.”

Toby’s phone beeps, and after he checks the screen, he sighs. “Well, no rest for the wicked. The boss man needs me, so I’ll have to catch up with you guys later. Have fun.”

I wave as he moves through the crowd. “Bye, Tobes. Thanks.”

When I look at Jake, he’s frowning down at his phone.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing. Just doing my questionnaire like a good little sheep.” His mood is still dark. I wish I knew how to lighten it.

You could go back in time and make different choices.

I bring up the questionnaire on my phone and work through it. “What would happen if you found someone here tonight who was your perfect match? Would you date them?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m still recovering from the last person I thought was my perfect match.”

I lean back against the bench, and we’re both quiet as we answer the questions. It covers a huge range of topics and hypothetical situations. Not sure how they all work together to form a personality profile, but according to Eden, Max is an expert at this. No doubt he worked in tandem with Toby to develop the whole thing.