Take This Regret (Take This Regret #1)(18)
Author: A.L. Jackson

Relief flooded me, and I exuded an audible force of air from my lungs, preparing myself to thank her, but the line went dead before I was given the chance.

Gripping the steering wheel, I peered up through my windshield at the yel ow arches and fought to bring my breathing under control. To merely say I was nervous would be an injustice. The anxiety was suffocating. I knew today would be the defining moment in my life.

Today I would meet my daughter.

I wanted nothing more, but truthful y, I was terrified. I had no idea what to expect, how to act, or how to be a father. I didn’t even know if Lizzie knew I was her father.

Worse than all of those fears was the worry that this would be the one chance I would have, the one encounter with a daughter that I knew nothing of but loved with all my soul. I had no idea what had made Elizabeth change her mind, what caused her to call me in the middle of the night, but I had to hold onto the hope that she saw my sincerity, that she understood I only wanted to make things right.

I rubbed my damp palms against my jeans before stepping from the car. Elizabeth’s little red car sat empty across the lot from where I’d parked.

My heart pounded, and I tried unsuccessful y to keep my hands from trembling as I moved to the entrance.

Pausing at the door, I drew a breath deep into my lungs in an attempt to calm myself before stepping inside. There were people everywhere, but my eyes were drawn across the restaurant to where Elizabeth and Lizzie stood, waiting hand-in-hand. Lizzie’s face was graced with the most amazing smile the moment she saw me. My racing nerves were soothed by her warmth and an uncontained smile spread across my face. She started bouncing in place as I made my way across the room and, if it was possible, her smile grew. The only thing that kept me from running and sweeping Lizzie into my arms was Elizabeth. Her face was nearly expressionless, though I could see everything behind her eyes, could feel it radiating off her body.

Hate.

Elizabeth hated me.

My face fel along with the hope I had had that perhaps she was softening toward me.

I held her malignant gaze for a split second before tearing my attention from her and placing it on the reason I was there. I knelt on one knee in front of my daughter.

Lizzie’s blue eyes gleamed with delight, her smile unending. My eyes wandered over her, and for the first time, I was able to ful y take in my daughter.

Her black hair was pulled into pigtails on each side of her head, accentuating the roundness of her face. She wore denim shorts and a pink T-shirt with flowers and butterflies embroidered across the front. I couldn’t help but grin when I saw her smal feet clad in bright pink flip-flops—her tiny toes painted pink. My baby girl liked pink. The soft skin of her arms and legs was pale and smooth.

Desperately wishing to hold her, I wanted nothing more than to have her wrap her arms around my neck.

Smiling softly when I looked back at her face, I spoke for the first time to my daughter. “Hi, Lizzie.” She giggled. “Hi.”

The sound of her laugh took my breath away.

“I’m . . .” Suddenly, I became very uneasy, unsure of how to introduce myself. Wary, I glanced up at Elizabeth, hoping for direction, an indication of how she would want me to proceed. She glared at me almost as if she were daring me to say it.

Swal owing heavily, I opened my mouth once more, trying to force out the words, “I’m your—” Lizzie laughed again. “I know who you are, sil y. You’re my daddy.”

Daddy.

I was struck with the magnitude of what that meant, the responsibility of being a father. Waves of devotion swept through me as I silently promised her I would always be there for her, would always love her, would be the best father I could possibly be.

Nodding slowly, I reached a shaky hand out to her face, running the back of my hand along the softness of her cheek. “Yes, I’m your daddy.”

A wounded cry escaped Elizabeth, and she jerked, her body shrinking away from us while she still held onto Lizzie’s hand as if she were trying to remove herself from the situation without leaving her daughter’s side. She turned her face as far from us as possible but not far enough to hide the stream of tears that flowed down her cheeks.

Guilt that would have brought me to my knees brought me to my feet. Stepping to her side, I tried to meet her face.

“Elizabeth.” It came out strangled and smal , fil ed with desperation.

She put up her hand to block the obvious apology that was coming. “Just . . . don’t.”

Dropping her hand and shifting her focus from me, she looked down at Lizzie, and her hardened face melted into sudden tenderness. “Let’s get something to eat, sweetheart.”

Lizzie nodded with excitement and fol owed her mother, Elizabeth’s hold still firm on our daughter’s hand. I trailed by a few steps, getting in line directly behind them.

While a gentleman would have volunteered to pay, I was wise enough to know the firestorm that particular offer would bring. I watched in adoration as Lizzie swayed beside her mother, glancing over her shoulder at me every few seconds and flashing me the sweetest smile I’d ever seen. I loved her—so much so it hurt, and with each second that passed, it only grew.

After ordering, Elizabeth moved aside, and I stepped to the register. Honestly, the last thing I felt like doing was eating, but I asked for first thing I saw when I glanced at the menu. I all owed Elizabeth to lead, fol owing her and my child to fil our drinks before setting my tray on the opposite side of the table from them.

It was probably the most awkward situation I’d ever been in as I slid into the booth. I watched as Elizabeth hovered over the table. She took their food from the tray and put it on the table, jamming straws into their drinks and refusing to meet my face. The worst part was I couldn’t take my eyes off her. Very unsuccessful y, I tried not to ogle her as she leaned in, tried to ignore how the grey tank top she wore exposed just a hint of the swel of her br**sts, tried to pretend her tight black jeans didn’t remind me of the perfection of her body and how it had felt against mine.

Damn it, Christian. Get yourself together. This was not why I was here. That reason suddenly climbed into the spot beside me, shocking me by choosing to sit next to me.

I grinned at her and scooted down a little to make room for her. She sat on her knees so she could reach the table, and then inched even closer so we were touching. Instinctively, I wrapped my arm around her back and pulled her closer, nestling her against my side. It felt amazing. Then she kissed my cheek.

I froze, overcome with the staggering warmth created with that one simple gesture. I stared at her, unwil ing to look away from the love swimming in Lizzie eyes.