Pulled(55)
Author: A.L. Jackson

“We can’t ever let that happen again. We have to talk, no matter what.

There would be no need for worry about that.

“I’m not going anywhere. You couldn’t get rid of me now if you tried.” She grinned at my admission, nodding her head in agreement.

Melanie fidgeted for a minute. “How’s Erin?” She flinched as Erin’s name passed through her lips. It had not occurred to me before then that Melanie had missed Erin as much as Erin missed her.

“She’s really good. She misses you.”

She looked at me skeptically.

“She loves you, Mel. Believe me when I say you’ve been a sore spot between us all these years.”

“What?”

I sighed, not looking forward to this revelation.

“She had gone to Europe after graduation. She didn’t get back until after I’d gone to Dal as for you, and when she found out what happened, she was set to go and find you, insisting something had to have happened. But I wouldn’t let her. I made her promise to leave you alone and never contact you.”

Melanie recoiled as if she had been slapped.

“Why?”

Why? Because I thought it was a really f**king bright idea at the time, that I was doing you a favor, that it would be easier for you that way.

I groaned, once again disgusted with myself. “I thought you’d feel guilty for leaving if Erin confronted you about it. Melanie, baby, I thought you wanted me…us out of your life. You and I both know how Erin is. She would have had you packed and on your way home, even if that wasn’t what you really wanted. I couldn’t all ow that. I wanted you to live, to be happy, and I thought that meant removing my family from the picture.”

“I thought you all had abandoned me.” Melanie shook her head.

“I’m so sorry, Melanie. I hurt you, all the while thinking I was protecting you.” I drew her close, praying none of the shit we had to hash out would drive a wedge between us.

“Don’t apologize, Daniel. I understand what you were trying to do. I was just so alone. I had lost everybody, everything; you, Eva, Erin.” I flinched at her words, realizing I had no idea how much she had suffered. “Your mom and dad had been like parents to me, and they were just…gone.” She hesitated. “Do you know I haven’t spoken to my father since leaving the hospital nine years ago? And things with my mom, wel , they were never the same. I’ve seen her a handful of times since then, but I just could never completely forgive her for taking you away from me.” Alone.

I knew how empty I had been, how alone I had felt.

Stil , I’d had my parents who had supported me, made sure I survived each day, and a sister who loved and encouraged me. Without them, I would never have been where I was today. In the beginning, they had kept me sane and breathing, but Melanie—she’d had no one.

“You’ll never be alone again.” I could promise her that.

I truly was a little shocked that she didn’t have a relationship with her parents. Yeah, they messed up our lives, no doubt. But they were her parents, and Melanie was always the first to forgive. I just couldn’t fathom that she’d spent all of this time hating them. On the other hand, I would never forget they were the ones who set in motion the chain of events that ultimately took my girl from me.

“You really haven’t talked to your dad since you left the hospital?”

She pursed her lips, shaking her head. “Nope, not once. I never even knew what he was most angry about—

me getting pregnant or the fact that I hid it from him. Either way, he disowned me. I was hurt at first, but over time, I realized just what a jerk he was. I mean, who would do that?”

I shook my head, at a loss. I was positive it was me he was angry with, not Melanie.

“What about your mom?”

Melanie sighed heavily, tucking the piece of hair that had fal en on her face behind her ear. “I don’t know.

She knew I’d never completely forgiven her. I guess she’s just kept her distance because of it.” She seemed so sad about the whole thing though her mouth twitched up a little at the corner as she spoke. “She called a few weeks ago. I could just tel things were different. She’s coming the week of Thanksgiving. I think we’re going to be okay.” With that, her lips spread into a real smile, and while it would not be so easy for me to forgive Peggy, it was obvious Melanie needed her mom in her life. There’d be no way I’d stand in the way of that.

I rol ed onto my back, pulling her with me. I reveled in the feel of her naked body pressed against mine as she lay against my chest. My hands slowly caressed her back, her shoulders, her head, relishing the feel of her hair as it fel over her shoulders and onto mine. Loving fingers ran through my hair, traced my jaw, and played across my lips.

Her touch felt so good, perfection across my skin.

She seemed thoughtful as she played with a lock of my hair. Her eyes finally locked with mine and filled with some unknown emotion. “You’re going to be a father.” I stiffened under her. I rol ed away, sitting up on the side of the bed. Thinking of Vanessa’s baby made it hard to breathe. Melanie crawled up behind me, wrapping us up like a cocoon with the sheet. She leaned into me, holding me tight. “Daniel…what’s wrong?” Her touch calmed me. I roughly ran my hand over my face and through my hair.

“I…I…” I looked away, unable to face her, but unwil ing to lie. “I don’t want him.” I knew that statement was wrong in so many different ways. And honestly, I was terrified of Melanie’s reaction to him.

Melanie remained silent as she continued to soothe me, never faltering in the rhythmic movements she made on my shoulders and neck. With her mouth close to my ear, she spoke quietly. “You don’t want him? Do you want to talk about it?”

Did I? Not really, but I couldn’t hide from it much longer. In three months, I would have a son whether I liked it or not.

I turned to her. My lips were tight as I studied Melanie’s face, looking for any indication of how she felt about the fact that I was going to be a father. all I found was concern for me. “I messed up. I was careless and stupid, and now there’s a child who’s going to suffer because of a mistake I made.”

“Why do you think he’ll suffer?” Her voice was soft, confused.

And this was where I failed.

“Because I can’t love him.”

Her hand still ed for a brief moment before resuming its calming reassurance, the slight shaking in her fingertips my only clue she was disappointed in me, just as she should be.