Christian (The Mitchell/Healy Family #3)(17)
Author: Jennifer Foor

In all of my attempts to do the right thing I’d somehow forgotten how precious our relationship was. I comforted myself with other women to prevent her from wanting me. I’d given her every reason to seek attention from another guy.

Being in the shower with her had been a mistake. I couldn’t look into those green eyes and picture them peering into another guy’s eyes the way they did mine. I couldn’t touch her skin and imagine that someone else had consumed every inch of it. I certainly couldn’t hold her hands any longer after wondering where they’d recently been.

This was a catastrophe. I needed to be alone; to dwell in the mess that I’d made of what could have been our future. Selfishly I knew I couldn’t tell her my feelings. She was too messed up over what she’d already done. Tangling more stress into the mix would be a dick move. Keeping her at a distance was all I could bring myself to do. I had to calm down before I was able to put on a brave face and pretend that she hadn’t just cut me into tiny pieces.

Hearing the door open and close let me know she’d left. More than anything I wanted to run after her. I needed her to know I’d never let her go. She had to know that every moment of every single day I was thinking about when we’d have a life together. My buried feelings had been forced free and now I struggled with the outcome. We still had two years of college; two years to make mistakes and find ourselves again. If she knew I returned her feelings she’d forget about what was important. I couldn’t let her lose focus. Somehow I had to get over this, and be the friend she needed, because losing her completely wasn’t an option either.

When I got up to retrieve my shoes I found the note. Her words caused me more confusion. Did she really think I wanted a life without her in it?

It made me angry, so much that I crumpled up the note and tossed it across the room. My next move was to call her and tell her off until she told me where she was so I could drag her ass back to my bed. Suddenly I didn’t care about Seth and what they’d done together. All I wanted was to remind her how important she was to my life.

The phone rang with no response. After a while it went straight to voicemail. I kept calling it, even when I’d gone out to look for her. I coasted every street from my place to hers with no sight of her anywhere. She obviously didn’t want to be found. It was the middle of the night. She’d be able to hear my car coming down the road and hide. I slammed my fist on the steering wheel out of frustration. By the time I’d reached her front door I didn’t care who was sleeping. I banged on it hard, waiting to be let in.

Becca answered in her pajamas. She was clearly not happy that I was standing on the porch. Instead of asking me what I wanted she simply opened the door and motioned for me to come inside. I burst through Christian’s bedroom door only to find the room vacant. After looking around for a piece of paper I noticed the used rubber in the trash can.

Sitting down was inevitable as another wave of jealousy hit me. Then I looked down noticing the messed up sheets and became enraged. I couldn’t take it. The image of that dude fucking her on the same bed that I sat on was like a kick in the balls. The reminder still so apparent, I reached down and began ripping the linens from the bed. Once I’d stripped everything off, I flipped the mattress completely over. I had to rid it of any reminder of Seth.

Since Christian obviously wasn’t home, I grabbed the sheets and blankets and left with them. After tossing everything in a local dumpster, I drove home still heated from everything that had transpired. With no sign of her back at my place I was left to sit awake all night, both annoyed and worried at the same time.

One way or another I’d have to get over my anger. I needed her more than she knew, and the fact that there was a chance that our friendship was over was making me sick. I wouldn’t stop until she knew the truth.

I couldn’t.

Chapter 11

Christian

I was a blubbering mess when I left Ethan’s house. My hair was still damp, making the shivering worse. When I heard his car coming my way I ducked behind a hedgerow to prevent being discovered. He couldn’t know how much he’d hurt me. Ethan had made it clear that our friendship couldn’t be anything more, and since I’d screwed up and slept with Seth, someone he clearly hated, I knew I’d damaged our already strained bond.

My phone rang until I shut it off, but not before seeing I had more messages from Seth. He was begging to explain everything to me, going on and on about how he and Mila were not together. To be honest it didn’t even matter to me. I couldn’t trust him, or his lunatic girlfriend. Drama wasn’t something I was used to, so it was important to stay out of it.

Once I’d shot him a quick text simply telling him to leave me alone, I continued walking back to my house. It was still dark out, even though I knew the early morning sunrise was only hours from showing its face. While the town slept, I was left to sob alone, without a single friend to call.

When I heard another car heading in my direction I ducked back behind a vehicle in case it was Ethan again. This time the driver didn’t keep going. They stopped and I heard the sound of the door shutting and footsteps heading in my direction. I peered around the car only to come face to face with Seth. The shock of him being the one person to find me made me uneasy. “What are you doin’ here?”

“I might ask you the same. What the hell are you doing out in the middle of the night? I thought you were with a friend.”

I shook my head. “I was. It’s a long story.” Frankly, I didn’t even want to explain it, especially with him.

“Come with me. I’ll take you home.” He held out his hand to motion for me to join him.

I wrapped my arms across my chest and stood still. “That’s not a good idea. I told you that we had nothin’ left to talk about.”

He seemed frustrated, gritting his teeth to hold back a boast of something he’d regret. “Look, just let me take you home. It’s dark, and who knows what could happen to someone who looks like you.”

I rolled my eyes and walked toward his car. “Sayin’ that won’t get you back in my pants.”

Once we were both inside I appreciated the heat being on. My frigid fingers started to warm up as we took off down the road, except we weren’t headed in the direction of my house.

It was too early to panic, so I simply asked. “Where are you takin’ me? Did you already forget where I live?”

“I know where you live, but you’re coming back to my place until you listen to me.”