Christian (The Mitchell/Healy Family #3)(53)
Author: Jennifer Foor

This was everything to me.

Our kiss was short lived. I had to hear it again; a million more times before it would begin to be too much. “Tell me again.”

He pulled one hand up, rolling his thumb over my lips. “I love you, way more than a friend. I love you like I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I always have and I always will.”

Chapter 33

Ethan

Her kiss sent pleasure throughout my bones. No longer did I have to hold back. She was mine, like she should have been all along. Realizing how fragile she still was, I went easy, backing away from our kiss after only a few moments. I brushed the hair back behind her ears, never taking my eyes off of hers. “I don’t want to get carried away.”

“It’s okay. I’d tell you if I needed to stop.”

“I’ve thought about you so much. It’s killin’ me to want you this bad.”

I could tell she needed a second to comprehend what I was implying. I’d never force her into a decision that could be damaging to her recovery, so I had to be patient and let her decide where this reunion was going to go.

“I want you too, Ethan. It’s just…I’m a little apprehensive. I know that I’m physically able to be with you, but mentally I’m scared it’s too soon.”

“I get it. Just know that these hands,” I held them up to show her. “Were meant to touch you. My arms were meant to hold you, and I know for a fact that my heart was meant to love you.”

Trying not to look disappointed in what wouldn’t come next, I leaned in and kissed her again. As it began to progress into something deeper; something more intense, we both stopped. “Maybe I should go.” I began backing away while holding one of her hands. I couldn’t get carried away.

She pulled me back. “When you talk like that it makes me crazy. Don’t go. Stay here with me, like we used to. I want to wake up in your arms, so I know this ain’t just a dream.”

Kissing her forehead was comforting. “It’s not a dream. You have my heart, Chris. You always have. I’m surprised you didn’t notice, especially after everything that happened. Couldn’t you tell how jealous I was? Couldn’t you see that it killed me to see you with someone else?”

When I said it I worried that speaking about her time with Seth was going to set us back, but she smiled, reassuring me that I hadn’t screwed up our moment. “You were actin’ weird, that’s for sure, but I believed you were always tellin’ me the truth. I think I wanted you to love me so badly that I couldn’t accept you actually might.”

“I should have told you the truth a long time ago.”

“You’re here now. My doctor says that I need to stop dwellin’ on what I can’t change. If everything led us to this very moment then I’m not goin’ to complain anymore. This is all I’ve ever wanted.”

“Me too.”

She pushed me to the side and made her way over to the ladder. “Wait here. I’ll be back in ten minutes.”

“Where’re you goin’?”

A half-smile formed in the corner of her lips. “You’ll see in a few minutes. Don’t you dare leave.”

“I won’t!” I promised.

I watched her walk out of the barn, all the while with a huge smile on my face. I’d made a ton of mistakes. My immaturity could have cost me everything, but somehow I’d found my way back to my girl.

I knew I’d have to tell her about Amber, but for now I wanted our time together to be special. This place was sacred to us. I’d never ruin it with painful conversations about the past.

It took her a little more than ten minutes, not that I was counting. While she was gone I sat down on a bale of Timothy hay and took in the ambience of the loft. I recalled an array of lit candles, and the two of us tangled up together in one sleeping bag. Our first time wasn’t like other teenagers experiences. We took our time, exploring every inch of one another, with patience and compassion. I didn’t believe it back then, but our love was already so powerful. She owned me, utterly and completely. My constant battle to accept that had cost me dearly, finally proving without a doubt that everything I was experiencing was the proof I required.

I peered down watching her approach the ladder with both of her hands full. She lifted up a large duffle-bag, and stuck another one over her back as she began to climb. With a giant smile covering her face she starting unzipping each bag, revealing her intentions for the rest of our evening.

“Please tell me your parents don’t know I’m here.”

“My parents helped me pack all this stuff. Stop worryin’, Ethan. We’re adults. They’d rather know than not. Although, my dad did leave you a note in the lower, left pocket of that bag.” She pointed to the bigger bag. “He may have mentioned the removal of your lower appendages, but he’s probably kiddin’.” She giggled.

I squirmed as I unfolded the letter and began to read it out loud.

“Ethan,

It’s a difficult time for a father to accept that his daughter is a grown woman. I’ve watched her struggle throughout life, but she’s always had one constant.

It’s you.

Thank you for lovin’ my daughter. I’d appreciate it if you respected her, and promise that you’ll always be her best friend.

If you don’t, just know I’ll find ya.

Colt Mitchell,

Your someday-father-in-law”

Christian was already laughing. I shrugged and folded up the note, sticking it in my back pocket. “I reckon I better do as he says.”

“Probably.”

“So what’s in the bags?”

“Flameless candles, some snacks, a container of tea, two pillows, and two sleepin’ bags,” she explained.

“Are you certain that your dad ain’t goin’ to come out here with his rifle?” I just needed verification on that before I agreed to spend the night with the guy’s daughter.

“My father and brother know we’re out here together. Don’t get your panties in a bunch.”

“I won’t be closin’ my eyes all night, that’s for sure.”

“That’s just silly. They want me to be happy, Ethan, even if it means bein’ a little more lenient when it comes to you.” She slapped me lightly, laughing again. I’d forgotten how good it felt to make her smile. “Besides, I’m pretty sure they know I’m takin’ things slow.”