Christian (The Mitchell/Healy Family #3)(27)
Author: Jennifer Foor

It was pathetic that Chris being assaulted had finally broke me. It had caused me to realize that my plan had been shit. Procrastinating my feelings for her was the worst mistake I’d ever made. There was no denying that I’d always assumed we’d end up together. For the first time since recognizing how strong my feelings were, I feared that it was no longer going to happen, and I didn’t know how to cope.

After several hours of sitting alone in my room, drinking and researching survivors of rape I had a better understanding of everything she was going through. Despite the fact that every case was different, I knew Chris better than anyone, which also allowed me to read her actions.

Right now she was in denial. She knew what had happened, but was determined to act like it never did, because it gave her a false sense of security. She also thought that if nobody knew about it, she didn’t have to dwell on what she couldn’t change. Chris wouldn’t have to worry about what people were saying behind her back.

Pretending was not the answer though. I knew it was only a matter of time before she literally lost it, succumbing to the fact that some things in life can’t be resolved on their own.

I shot her a text message after I couldn’t hold out any longer. It took a long time for her to respond, but I was able to convince her to get out of the house. I picked her up a short while later with hopes to get something in her stomach. When Chris was upset she’d forget to eat, which wasn’t healthy in her current condition.

I could tell she was uncomfortable in her own skin when she came outside with a huge sweater wrapped around her body. She hugged it close to her chest, only letting go to open the car door and climb in.

When I reached over to greet her like I normally did with a kiss on her cheek she lurched away, and widened her eyes as if I’d just violated her. It offended me, but I immediately understood. “Sorry. It’s a habit.”

“I know. I’m not mad.”

“Do you know where you want to eat?” I asked, hoping to change the subject.

“Actually, can we stop somewhere first?”

I agreed, and followed the directions she gave me until we pulled up at the dilapidated home. From the street view I could see where caution tape had been removed from the door. It blew with the wind, catching my attention as Chris climbed out of the vehicle. “This is where it happened.”

I turned off the ignition and ran after her, praying she wouldn’t make it up the first step before I caught her. “Chris, wait!” I hurried, grabbing her by the arm at the last second. She jerked herself out of my hold.

“It needs to be done. I have to do this, Ethan. You can either come with me or wait outside.”

While I watched her speaking it was apparent that she was already a nervous wreck. Her lips trembled and her hands were shaking profusely. Her eyes, always so green, were filled with tears that were ready to drop down her cheeks at any second.

“Don’t go in there. You don’t have to cope this way. I read all about it.”

Out of nowhere she shoved me. “You don’t know how I feel. Don’t try to put yourself in my position, Ethan. You don’t want this.”

“I may not want it, but I’ll be damned if I sit back and watch you inflict more pain on yourself.”

She pointed toward the house, gritting her teeth as she spoke to me. “I’m goin’ inside. You can either come with me, or stay outside. Either way I’d appreciate it if you kept your opinions to yourself.”

She and I liked to disagree. On usual terms it would lead us to sleeping together. As much as I was trying to be supportive, I couldn’t condone her decisions. “You’re being a stupid bitch!”

She stormed inside of the old home, leaving me standing there alone. It took me a few seconds to calm down enough to face her again. When I had I journeyed toward the condemned property, praying that when I found her in the house, she wasn’t worse off.

My worst fears were revealed when I stepped inside of a large living room. At the far end was a mattress on the floor. Chris stood over it, peering down speechless. I approached her, reaching my hand out touching her shoulder. She jumped, turning around with frightened eyes. “Sorry, I wanted you to know I was in here.” I paused and looked back down at the bed. “This is the dumbest idea you’ve ever had. Please can we go now?”

Her body stiffened. “I can’t.”

It took everything in me not to pick her ass up and carry her out of the decrepit building. Instead of causing a huge scene, I leaped in front of her, standing on the mattress, and turning to face her. She looked so distraught, so weak.

“This is where he did it.”

I reached for her chin, pulling it up until she was looking me in the eyes. “It’s over, Chris. There’s no need to rehash it. Let me take you out of here.”

She shook her head, never allowing her gaze to linger from mine. “I left your place, and I was so mad at myself. All I wanted to do was get home. I was bein’ so careful, hidin’ behind things when cars would drive past. I knew the risks of bein’ out alone in the middle of the night.”

“One of those cars was mine. I looked everywhere for you.”

“I know,” she said sadly.

“I was ashamed of the letter I’d written. It wasn’t what I wanted. It was what I felt needed to happen.”

“Forget about it. I knew you’d come around. You can’t get rid of me that easy,” I reassured her.

“It doesn’t matter. Everything’s changed now.”

I opened my mouth to argue, but she cut me off.

“He must have seen me duckin’ behind that car. I tried to hide, but there he was, tellin’ me it wasn’t safe to walk the rest of the way. As mad as I was at what happened earlier at the movies, I knew I’d get home quicker. From the moment I got into the car I could smell the alcohol on his breath. I should have jumped out.”

She finally looked down at our feet. It made me feel awful. “This ain’t your fault, Chris. None of it.”

“Why did I agree to follow him inside this place? I should have known from the outside that it was shady? I should have known what would happen!” She began to weep, so hard that I had to catch her when her knees gave way. I could hear the pain in her sobs, and felt as if the world was crashing down around us. Her pain radiated through me, and all I wished was that I could somehow make it all go away.

“Tell me what to do, babe. Tell me how to help you?”