Avoiding Commitment (Avoiding #1)(31)
Author: K.A. Linde

"Well, I agree with you at least about Jack. I’m not sure if he’s ever been faithful with anyone he’s been with. But that’s the reason that you shouldn’t be concerned," she said feeling the lie start to form on her tongue. "Why would I let him get to me knowing that?" She really wanted the answer to that question.

He just shook his head. "I dunno Lexi, but I hope you’re right."

"You know me better than that," she said snuggling closer to him.

"You’re right. I do. I love you Lexi."

She gulped. "I love you too."

All throughout dinner Lexi remained aloof and withdrawn from the group. Her conversation with Clark echoed in her ears. She couldn’t help wondering if she should tell Clark that Jack had kissed her. But if she did that, then she would have to tell him about going out on the beach with Jack. She would have to explain why she had continued to meet him on the beach after that first night. She wasn’t sure that she would be able to do that. Sure they had said they were going to just be friends, but she wasn’t an idiot. They wouldn’t be sneaking off together every night if they were just friends. After everything that had happened between them, Lexi was pretty certain that they could never just be friends.

"You sure you don’t want to join me? I’m sure you would sleep better in my arms," Clark persuaded hugging her tightly around the middle outside of her bedroom.

"Rain check. I’m really beat," she said nuzzling into his arm. She was really tired. That was the true part of the statement. The only problem was she wouldn’t be sleeping again for several hours.

"Alright. If you change your mind, you know where I am."

He kissed her once more and then trotted up the stairs. Lexi breathed a sigh of relief that he hadn’t pushed her further on the subject. She quickly ambled into her room. This was the worst part about the night. Waiting. For Sandy to either sneak out of the room to visit Seth or pass out. Waiting. For the sounds of Clark and the guys quieted down and subsiding to slumber. Waiting. For the coast to clear.

After what felt like an eternity, Lexi extracted herself from Sandy’s grip and slinked out of the room. She rubbed her tired eyes as she moved into the den. Her smile lit up when she found Jack waiting for her. He could have been asleep. She was the one who waited for the coast to clear before coming to find him. There was no need for him to wait up for her. Those few hours rest were like gold right now, and he had chose to stay up and wait for her instead.

"Miss me?" she asked sitting down next to him on the lumpy light blue sofa.

He yawned in the midst of answering her, "Ohhhhhh…yeaaaaa."

"We should probably get out of here," she said feeling his arm come around her middle and hold her in place. He tilted them backwards so that they were spooning comfortably on the couch. She sighed pleasantly and nestled closer to him. Thoughts of leaving left her as she felt slumber draw close. The soothing feel of Jack’s breath hot on her neck caused her eyes to flutter close, and she could feel herself begin to drift off. Then she felt his lips pressed to that same spot on her neck, and all of a sudden she was wide awake. It was only one kiss, but it left her heart speeding ahead of her. She rolled to face him, and met his smoldering gaze. Everything about their embrace in the moment showed that they weren’t friends. That they could never be friends. That they were stupid for even trying. All she wanted to do was kiss him. Every nerve in her body was pushing her closer towards him. She had never stopped wanting him as much as she tried to deny the obvious facts. When they were together, she lost all cognitive thought.

Jack moved closer, as if there was any room between them, and she could almost feel his sweet lips on her…almost taste him. A rumbling from upstairs stilled their movement. They waited a second for the noise to die away, but after a few seconds, it returned and stronger.

Lexi swore under her breath. The universe was really trying to keep them apart. Jack smiled at her reaction, but his face was strained.

"What’s going on up there?" she whispered to him in the darkness.

"No idea, but you should probably go back to your room," he whispered back. His meaning was clear. They could not be in a more compromising situation. If she didn’t get back now, everything would blow up in their face.

"No."

"Lex, you have to get back."

"No."

"You can come back once everyone goes back to sleep."

"No."

"No, you won’t come back?"

"No, I’m not leaving."

"You’re so stubborn. We’re going to get caught. Go back to your room."

"No, let’s go to the beach instead."

"Do you not hear that upstairs?" he asked pausing to allow her to listen to the continued noise.

"Jack, I hear it, but they’re just going to go back to sleep, and then we’ve missed all our time together."

His blue eyes intensely stared at her before finally speaking, "Fine. Let’s get out of here before they come downstairs." He scooted them off the couch, and after snatching up her hand, dove out of the house and down the stairs.

"How do you know they are coming downstairs?" she asked enjoying the feel of his hand entwined with her own.

"Were you not listening at dinner?" Jack asked lightly swinging their hands as they neared the water line. "I forgot about the conversation when we were…together."

"Oh…no, not really. I was pretty spaced out I guess."

"Yeah, I think I noticed that."

"So what’s going on?"

"Seth dared Hunter to go skinny dipping tomorrow in the middle of the day. Hunter agreed, but only if everyone else did it too. The girls were pretty grossed out by that concept. So Seth said they would do it after all the girls went to sleep. Didn’t want to ruin his prospects of having a foursome."

Lexi giggled. "Yeah, I could see that. I guess I was really out of it. Somehow I managed to miss that entire conversation."

Without uttering another word, the couple began to take a slow paced stroll along the beach. If they stayed in front of the house, then they would be caught together by the potential skinny dippers. The feel of Jack’s hand in her own almost burned her. All she could think about was how close to kissing they had been earlier on the couch. She would have succumbed to him. The familiar feeling of losing control had taken over her. Instead of steering away from the feeling, she had gotten lost in it once again. And now she was out on the beach with him when any of their friends could find them missing at any moment. Surprise washed over her when they stopped in front of the pier. The pier was over a mile away from their beach house, and time with Jack had just flown by she hadn’t even realized that they had been walking so long.

He nudged her forward to keep her moving, and they slunk along the wooden planks. Lexi skirted the edge where an old fishing pole rested surrounded by dried up bait. They reached the edge and sat down on a green bench set up for tourists.

"I don’t know if I can do this anymore," Jack’s husky voice muttered sounding defeated. It was such a strange sound coming out of him that Lexi had to stare into his face to even believe that he could feel that way.

Lexi knew what he meant. Her heart was racing knowing that they were so close together, but they couldn’t be together. Only a mile up the coast, their significant others were blissfully unaware of what was happening out on the pier. She felt terrible about the deception. Not only was the sleep deprivation killing her, but the lying too. She couldn’t keep up this act for much longer. Not when Jack wanted her. The way he had kissed the nape of her neck had proved that. He had been trying to hold back how he felt from her all week, but moments like that kept creeping in to their time together. But they weren’t supposed to be together. Hadn’t she only thought earlier that the universe was just trying to keep them apart?

"I know what you mean," she sadly whispered her chin dropping to meet her chest in anguish.

"I’m not sure I want to break up with Kate though," he said miserably.

That snapped her right out of her own pity party. Break up with Kate!Holy shit! Where had that come from? Maybe they were talking about two different things. "Uh, Jack?"

He titled his head to look at her under his thick dark lashes. "Yes my dear?"

"You’ve been thinking of breaking up with Kate?" She couldn’t keep the disbelief out of her voice.

He nodded choking on his own words. "Ever since I saw you like a vision on the beach the first day you got here."

"Wh…Why would you do that?" She knew the answer. But she wanted to hear him say it.

"I thought that was quite obvious."

She waited eager to hear his confirmation.

"For you."

She sighed pleasurably at the way that sounded coming out of his mouth. She had wanted to hear that for so long. But would he break up with Kate? Could she think about breaking up with Clark? Her heart ached painfully at the mere thought of letting him go. She didn’t want things to change with Clark. She loved Clark.

She just didn’t know exactly how she felt about Jack, and that scared her. Could she love Clark so much, and still want to spend so much time…have so many inappropriate thoughts about Jack at the same time? God, she wasn’t sure, and her head was pounding with the waves of confusion overtaking her.

"For me?" she finally got out.

"How could you not know?"

"I knew, but I thought it was like last time. I didn’t think you would want to end things with her. I didn’t think you want to…be with me," she whispered into the cool ocean breeze.

Her hair whipped around her head and a long strand landed across her face. Jack reached up and tucked the lock behind her ear for her. He pulled her face closer to his and his voice spoke gruffly into her ear, "You have always been what I want. I just made some mistakes along the way. I told you that I would make it up to you, that I would show you what I could be for you, if you would only let me."

Lexi’s mind was racing along ahead of his words. He wanted her. Just like she had always dreamed. How could she turn away from him so long as he wanted her? Consequences damned Lexi pushed her face forward and moved her lips against his. Taken by surprise, he remained stiff. She was relentless though and began to tease his bottom lip with her tongue. Enjoying the feeling, he moaned and she used the opportunity to insert her tongue in his mouth. She pulled back just long enough to straddle his body and she pressed herself firmly against him. His hands came up and wove their way into her thick brown hair. Yanking ever so lightly, he pulled her head back giving him access to her bare neck. She purred as he roughly kissed her neck hard enough to send waves of pleasure through her body, but not hard enough to leave a mark.

She grabbed the base of his shirt and began to pull it off over his head. He seemed to like the idea and did the same to her. He ogled her br**sts for a moment before taking them both in his hands and massaging them. She arched her back, and he moved to flick his tongue against her rigid n**ples. She was practically feverish for him. Despite the face that she could feel every inch of him, she felt that there was too much clothing in between them. She wanted to feel his skin against her. She wanted to feel his rock hard abs against her stomach, and his hands rake her nak*d form. God, she wanted to feel every inch of him deep inside of her.