Thoughtful (Page 52)
Thoughtful (Thoughtless #1.5)(52)
Author: S.C. Stephens
Releasing her, I backed away. I had to clutch my stomach, I was laughing so hard. The image of Pete fawning over me was just too much. Priceless. “Oh my God, Kiera! No, that’s not what I meant.” I was tearing up now, and had to wipe my eyes dry. My natural high was making this moment even funnier than it normally would have been. If I’d been on cloud nine before, she’d just lifted me to cloud ten. “God, I can’t wait to tell Griffin about that.”
Kiera didn’t find the moment as funny as I did. Her cheeks were flaming red, and I realized I was embarrassing her by laughing so much. I tried to control myself; it was difficult. “Ahhh…and you think I have a dirty mind.” Sorry, babe, but you’re just as freaky as I am.
I slipped my arms around her and let out a slow, steady, calming breath. When I felt like the uncontrollable urge to laugh had subsided, I said, “Didn’t you hear the response when I did that? You watch, tomorrow the bar will be twice as full. He’ll have to turn people away. I did it to help him, Kiera.” Shrugging, I rocked her back and forth, savoring the connection I felt between us.
Her expression shifted from annoyance to understanding. “Oh…well, I guess that makes sense. You bring in more people, he makes more money, you get more exposure, and I’m assuming more money as well…”
I really didn’t give a rat’s ass about the money I made, but she had the basic idea down. “Something like that.”
Her lip curled into the sexiest half smile I’d ever seen. My breath caught in my throat. I wanted to taste her skin, feel her softness, lose myself in kissing her…
“I guess I’ll just have to allow it then,” she told me. Then she leaned over and kissed my cheek.
Warmth burst across my face where she’d touched me. Not wasting a second, I kissed her cheek in return. She blinked, surprised, and a euphoria-filled smirk curved my lips. “If you get to break a rule…so do I.”
I gave her a wink, then started pushing her toward the Chevelle. I was ready for the cuddling portion of our evening to begin. I was ready for a lot of things to begin.
As we got into the car, Kiera commented, “You’re awful perky tonight.”
I couldn’t contain my smile. “It’s not every night that I get to sleep with a beautiful woman.” Honestly, I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d slept all night with a girl. I was pretty sure I never had. If a girl came over for sex, she left soon afterward. If I went somewhere for sex, I left afterward. Cuddling had never even been suggested before. Kiera didn’t know it, but tonight was a first for me.
As I started the car, I noticed that she seemed a little uneasy about my remark; she’d taken it as dirty again. She also seemed a bit…sad. To ease her mind that we weren’t doing anything overly wrong, I told her, “Hey, I said sleep, not fu—”
Her tone was sharp as she interrupted my coarse language. “Kellan!”
Her displeased expression was so distracting that I had a little trouble thinking up a different term to use. I sifted through F words until I found one that was slightly more savory. “Fu…or…ni…cate?” She had to give me props for trying.
Laughing, she scooted across the seat until she was pressed into my side, then she laid her head on my shoulder. Heaven.
When we got home, Kiera disappeared into her bedroom. For a moment, I thought she was going to back out of our arrangement. Disappointment instantly surged over me. I wanted this so much it hurt. It took her twenty minutes, but she eventually stepped out of her room, fully dressed. She was even wearing a sweater. I laughed as I looked her over. All that was missing was a set of gloves, a hat, and maybe a hazmat suit, and she’d be as protected from me as she could be.
As she stepped into the bathroom to brush her teeth, I playfully asked her, “Are you sure you’ll be warm enough in that?” She rolled her eyes as she shut the door, and I laughed. This is happening.
When she was finished, I changed places with her. As I stared at myself in the mirror, I heard her walk into my bedroom. She was in my room. Closing my eyes, I exhaled a slow breath. I could do this. I could keep it light, carefree, casual. I wouldn’t mess up and scare her away by going too far. Even though I wanted nothing more than to kiss every inch of her body, I would be good. The connection was what mattered, not the physical stuff. When I reopened my eyes, I glanced at my reflection. I still had sort of a glow about me, thanks to the layer of dried sweat on my face. I ran the water, made it as warm as I could tolerate, then rinsed my face. When I was done, I patted myself dry and looked again. I still seemed to be radiating. Maybe it was Kiera giving me the glow. With a shake of my head, I brushed my teeth. I was hopeless. Absolutely hopeless.
When I got back to my room, Kiera was standing in the middle of it, staring at the bed, her expression torn. I considered asking her what she was thinking about, but then she might want to talk about us. I wasn’t ready for that. There was safety in silence.
I indicated the bed, which she seemed reluctant to get into. “Go ahead. It won’t bite you.” With a laugh, I added, “I won’t either.” Keep it light, keep it playful.
She looked back at me with an amused smile, then took a deep breath and crawled under the covers. Like I told her I would, I lay down on top of the covers. It was an odd way to sleep, and I was pretty sure I was going to freeze my butt off, but I’d put up with anything to be with her. Accepting my chilly fate, I rolled over onto my side to face her. I slung my leg over hers and draped an arm over her stomach. Even through the blankets between us, it felt amazing to be next to her. It felt right, like I belonged beside her.
Stretching across her, I turned off the light on my nightstand. Darkness blinded me, but my other senses sharpened. I could smell the flowery fragrance of her shampoo as I laid my head down beside her and pulled her close. I could hear her soft breathing. My heart pounded in my chest, and I was instantly aware of every section of my body that was touching hers. What I wouldn’t give to be under the covers with her. To have nothing between us, no sheets, no clothes…no secrets, no walls.
“Kellan…” Her voice sounded a little strained, like she was struggling.
“Yeah?”
“Could you please turn the light back on?”
A soft laugh escaped me at her question. My closeness was getting to her. That made me happy. I wanted to get under her skin.
Reaching across her again, I flipped the light back on. I blinked in the harshness, and immediately missed the intimacy of the dark. Without light on us, it was easier to pretend that we weren’t doing anything wrong…that we weren’t skirting around a very dangerous cliff, where only pain and suffering were waiting for us if we fell.
Shaking off my morose thoughts, I lightly asked her, “Better?” Settling back down on the pillows, I propped myself up on an elbow so I could look down at her. Her eyes were more golden than green tonight. Honey, with emerald flakes. Gorgeous.
She seemed mesmerized as we stared at each other. Then all of a sudden, she blurted out, “Who was your first time?”
Her random question caught me off guard. “What? Why?”
Looking embarrassed, she swallowed. “Well, you asked about Denny and me. It’s only fair.”
Now I was embarrassed, and I studied my sheets. I shouldn’t have gone there, shouldn’t have asked her that. Damn curiosity. “I guess I did, didn’t I?” I peeked up at her. “Sorry about that…that really wasn’t any of my business.”
She gave me a victorious smile. “Just answer the question.”
I laughed as she used my line against me. Touché. Thinking back through my numerous dalliances, I tried to recall the details about the girl who’d taken my virginity. Bright blue eyes, platinum-blond hair, and a smile that promised a good time instantly filled my mind. I couldn’t remember her name…I’d always called her Marilyn in my mind. Marilyn Monroe. Classy, curvy, and kind of slutty.
While I recalled the past, a funny expression formed on Kiera’s face, like she couldn’t believe I had to think about it. I suppose it was a lot easier for her; she was still dating her first time. I laughed at her look, then told her, “Well…she was a girl from the neighborhood, sixteen, I think…very pretty. She seemed to like me…” Remembering just how much she’d liked me, I smiled. “It was just a couple of times one summer.”
Her expression changed and her voice came out quiet, like she was afraid her question would hurt me. “Oh…why, what happened?”
She seemed so serious about it that I couldn’t resist teasing her, and a part of me was curious if she’d believe me if I said something outlandish. Running my fingers through her hair, I murmured, “I got her pregnant and she had to move in with her aunt to have the baby.”
She immediately flipped to her side to face me. “What!”
Laughing, I poked her nose. “I’m just kidding, Kiera.”
With a grunt, she pushed me away. “That’s not nice.”
I sat up on my elbow again. “You bought it though. You must think the worst of me.” By her tone, I could tell she hadn’t doubted my story…because deep down, she thought I was the kind of person who would just abandon someone in that situation. She thought I would run if things were too hard. And I almost did run from Kiera. Was that why she didn’t trust me? Was I trustworthy? Look at what I’d done to Denny. “I’m not a monster, Kiera.” I may have broken Denny’s trust, but I’d never break hers.